~jUicY tRuTh~

au revoir

2011-11-21T06:57:00.001-08:00

its hard when you miss someone but you can't do anything about it; because having the space between the two of you is the only way to make things right.

xoxo,nadiaismadi

if this is the price that i have to pay, i can never afford it

2011-11-07T06:22:00.000-08:00

I am not so sure if this is what I really want. Sometimes I wish i never give in. InsyaAllah, there are hidden blessings behind all these that I yet to discover. I shall have faith.

xoxo,nadiaismadi

you played through my mind like a symphony

2011-10-29T18:20:00.000-07:00

exam.

stress.

doubts.

unexpected occurrence.

surprises.

mistakes.

regrets.

faith.

i am tired.

xoxo,nadiaismadi

i owe you big time

2011-10-26T10:22:00.000-07:00

I'm so glad somehow we met and this actually means a lot to me. you are an amazing friend and yes, I'm spoiled now; thank you. =P

thanks for those wonderful thoughts and time.

you know who you are ;)

xoxo,nadiaismadi

silence

2011-10-23T05:20:00.000-07:00

yeap, agreed.

xoxo,nadiaismadi

2011-10-23T00:08:00.000-07:00

there are days where I wish things were so much simpler and easier. to handle, to understand, to let go. I guess I am just too complicated. even TRYING to understand me is hard. Thanks again but I don't even know it this is what I want. I honestly don't know.

xoxo,nadiaismadi

alhamdulillah, its crystal clear now

2011-10-20T01:15:00.000-07:00

I don't know where to begin but,... probably whatever that was about to start had just ended. I am glad that I went through this pain to realize what was actually happening and I'm grateful that I still have chance to make things better. This "guidance" is really what I had been praying for and He had answered me. Alhamdulillah. ;)

xoxo,nadiaismadi

thanks baby, that's exactly what i need ;)

2011-10-17T17:35:00.000-07:00

"When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them). I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calleth on Me; Let them also, with a will, listen to My call, and believe in Me; That they may walk in the right way." (AlBaqarah:186)

Let's take a moment and pray to Him. May Allah bless you, I love you. -nadia kodri

thanx a lot dear, u never fail to spark the motivation and pull me back up when i fall. I am grateful to be blessed with an amazing friend like you and I thank Allah for this blessing. I love you more ;)

p/s: sorry i couldn't upload the pics of us, but I found this! =P

xoxo,nadiaismadi

if its meant to be it will be

2011-10-15T21:00:00.000-07:00

i know what i have to do and no matter how hard it is, it needs to be done. probably, this is just another mirage that i happen to pass by and i shall move on from here. thanks for the memories. =)

xoxo,nadiaismadi

my life is a living drama

2011-10-08T00:16:00.000-07:00

there she goes, there she goes again... mama da nk start da drama swasta dia.. haih -.-'' thanks for the very good laugh that eased my stress. doakan nadia ma, I LOVE YOUUUU!

xoxo, nadiaismadi

i don't ever see the days that i won't catch you when you fall

2011-10-06T20:09:00.000-07:00

this post is for my dearest sister, sakinah ismadi. Firstly, no matter what happens, don't ever give up. We have faith in you and we believe that you can. Its okay if you slipped this time but promise me in the future more hard work, aite?

Come what may, we will ALWAYS be here to support you and we will ALWAYS love you so much. i'm sorry for not being able to be there but i want you to know that i care. And yes, always bear in mind that; i've NEVER seen a day that i won't hold your back when you need me. InsyaAllah, we'll do fine. make mama and ayah proud! =D

p/s: to miss munmun, please stop being jealous and start studying! don't waste time! =P love you guys to bits! (i'll b seeing you guys later)

xoxo, your cheesiest and most beloved kak nad ;)

if i let you go, i will never know what my life would be holding you close to me

2011-10-05T05:32:00.000-07:00

i couldn't deny this whisper in my heart saying that one day, you will look at me saying i'm the one who you had been looking for. however, there is another voice warning me of this hope and how it may crash in the end. its a gamble and i'm up for it.

xoxo, nadiaismadi

all i want is for you to tell me that i can do this

2011-10-04T07:43:00.000-07:00

am under a lot of pressure these days. i'm just tired. exhausted, more likely. that's all i have to say, really.

Seeing the sadness that other people hide made you feel the sorrow that you have is nothing to compare

2011-07-26T04:54:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry,. I can't be of a help. I am helpless. very actually. Its hard for you, I know. Its even harder for me to see you holding it in like this. If you need anything, I'll be here. Always. Always have and always will.

i found that i gave up hope before i even have anything to begin with

2011-07-16T12:30:00.000-07:00

its the end of this fantasy. its nice to know that waking up from nightmares always mean that they are not real. but this one is.

it shattered into a million pieces,. okay maybe just cracked

2011-07-12T03:46:00.000-07:00

that's it,. my Starbucks tumbler. I broke it, a few minutes ago. sobs. Its my beloved tumbler! may it rests in peace. ;(

Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak; sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go

2011-06-20T23:46:00.000-07:00

those brief but beatiful moments shall always be cherished despite you may have forgotten them now., thank you anyway.

xoxo, Nadia Ismadi

I got disappointed in human nature as well and gave it up because I found it too much like my own.

2011-06-13T07:33:00.000-07:00

I always blamed it on the other things such as; she-who-shall-not-be-named are being favoured, i just don't understand how things work anymore, why things are just so different and unfair,... This list could go on and on. I should maybe just shut up because it (as much as I think that I can't bear this) is my responsibility . full stop.

But I can't help the feelings that there are times that I just feel like I need a break, from all this. Let me excuse myself for a moment, I'll be back.

xoxo, Nadia Ismadi

there are bizillion other stars when that one doesn't sparkle

2011-06-12T09:47:00.000-07:00

It was amazing,. I am very grateful first of all, to be there and share these moments with you guys. =)

to my dearest;

*Tharane Ravi

*Maia Yakob

*Vishanti Chinaya

*Fadzlin Hanis

*Aisyah Harun

*Shatish Nair

*Fahmi Laffi

*Faishal Laffi

*Bakri Bohari

thnks a lot for the awesome day we had and i hope this friendship will last forever and ever. =) Love u guys to bits

xoxo, Nadia Ismadi

a true Cinderella story

2011-05-14T02:44:00.001-07:00

Need i say more? The Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen's dress was magnificent! and yes, she's perfect.

positive thinking is an art of interpretation

2011-04-11T09:59:00.000-07:00

no wonder I have sweet teeth these days,... hmmmmm..

xoxo, Nadia.

28 days left and counting....

2011-04-11T09:35:00.001-07:00

trials is over. phewh,..I think i flunked my trials for some obvious reasons that shall not be discussed in public. and the real AS exam is just around the corner. almost everybody camp out in the study lounge which literally is my home now. and where i spent most of my time with a bunch of friends. "hardcoring". pretty much.

So, to all my beloved friends with AS and A2 fever tagging along these few weeks, ALL THE BEST!!! and hope we all get the results we desired for, insyaAllah. believe me, at the end of the day, it will all be worth it. (I actually have an after A-levels to-do list to keep reminding myself that I should work hard now and have fun later,. fighting!

Another few quandaries to deal with is..... Okay, I shall not freak myself out first and just do my very best. pray that Allah will show me the best path. i'm nervous,...

xoxo, Nadia

timeless

2011-02-01T04:49:00.001-08:00

Baby come close let me tell you this,
In a whisper my heart says you know it too,
Baby we both share a secret wish,
And you're feeling my love reaching out to you.

Timeless,
Don't let in end no,
Now that you're right here in my arms where you should stay,
Hold tight baby,
Timeless
Don't let it fade out of sight,
Just let the moment sweep us both away,
Lifting us to where
we both agree,
This is timeless, Love.

I see it all baby in your eyes,
When you look at me i know i feel it too, yes i do,
So let's sail away and be forever baby,
Where the crystal ocean melts into the sky,
We sholdn't let the moment pass,
Making me shiver let's make it last,
Why should we lose it,don't ever let me go..

Timeless
Baby its timeless
Oh baby its timeless

Timeless,
Don't let it fade out of sight,
Just let the moment sweep us both away,
Lifting us to where
we both agree,
It's just timeless
It's just timeless
.........................................
Love.

Timeless
by Justin Guarini & Kelly Clarkson

xoxo,Nadia

it breaks into a million pieces, unable to be stiched together

2011-01-31T03:55:00.000-08:00

I remembered having a severe headache and the room swirling around. That was the last thing i remebered before feeling this strong fist on my chest, people calling my name and shaking me to wake me up. I can hear them and I wanted to tell them that but I can't seem to be able to move my body. Not a limb. I became frustrated and I forced myself hard. Nothing happened. They lifted me up onto a bed and carried me into the ambulence. Liyana and Adam were there with me trying to calm me down, telling me that everything will be fine. I closed my eyes trying to sweep away the pain that I'm having and trying to convince myself that yes, everything will be okay.

I think if I weren't to die because of the pain that I'm having, I would involve in an accident while lying down in that very ambulence. It sped like nobody's business. -_-'' I was taken to the hospital. Mama, ayah and Sakinah came not long after that. I can't help the tears that streamed down my face the moment i saw them. Liyana, Adam, Dennis, Sabrina, Ety, Danial F, DE, Ken Lin, Emma, Aqwa, (i think that's all) came to the hospital too. I was (and still am) touched. Honestly, with all of them there, and with their wonderful gifts eased my pain a little,. Thanks guys, I owe you guys this.

Actually, this post is specially dedicated to the Most Awesome Samba Ever members (even to those whop can't make it during the incidece);

Guys, I owe this to all of you,. For screwing up this supposed-to-be-awesome-and-memorable reunion. I promise, I'll make up to this later okay? We'll have another one I hope (this time without paramedics involved). Thanks a lot for those sweet presents; they made my day. I just wanted to say that, no matter what happens, this breakdown has got nothing to do with whatever that happened during the gathering. I think i'm just too tired and exhausted. Hope we can conduct another proper gathering afterwards, please.

p/s: my parents send their regards and thanks to all of you guys ;)

I'm trying to get better and relieve all the burden and stress that I have in mind now. Please pray and keep your support going. I need them much. thanx

xoxo,. Nadia

if and only if...

2011-01-15T03:10:00.000-08:00

Dreams are possible right? Let me rephrase this, dreams are possible, the excecution is a little illusive. Positive thinking, please. Okay, whatever it is, just go for it! (I'm currently trying to push aside all these minor emotional distress and focusing on whatever that I shold focus on)

p/s: to Liyana Alsina, CONGRATS!!!! =)) way to go babe! proud of you! =D

xoxo

winds do shake darling buds of may.

2011-01-10T07:44:00.000-08:00

The fact that it had been a while to even begin with, it had been a tough and painful pause. To erase the memories is almost impossible and to digest them in is unbearable. How to escape unscathed? Do not jump in in the first place, which is to late to say now. Its just that, at times; no matter how hard you tried to keep the emotions stirred in you,unexposed; the beams are always visible in your eyes. They never lied. I'm tired. Too tired, in fact; I'm exhausted.

Anyway, those are just some metaphores that portray the unstable emotions that I'm fighting against. Anyway, college is opening tomorrow and enough of fooling around, its time to get serious now. Can't afford to disappoint them anymore. (by the word 'them', I mean the people that care and hope for the best in whatever that I'm doing) All the best Nadia, you'll need it. xoxo

let the traces of my revulsion be camouflaged by the perfect falling flakes

2011-01-04T08:23:00.000-08:00

How I wish that I somehow can mend this unintentionally done damages?

I'm just tired and these 'surprises' are not exactly what I need right now. Feel like taking big steps and walk away to a whole new place where no truth will ever hurt, no hearts can ever be broken and no tears will ever shed. Is there even such place? If so, please take me there. I had enough here.

another year had passed and the new chapter begins

2011-01-02T07:44:00.000-08:00

Welcoming the new year with a 'sitting-in-my-room-gossiping-with-my-sis-and-only-come-across-fireworks-by-luck' had almost been a tradition for me and i'm just so used to it. But this year, I felt that the routine stirred different emotions though its exactly the same. Don't know why it feels,. numb. (I'm not sure what word I am looking for, really.) 2011, I'm 19. (blinking) Like, seriously?! wow, it's... umm, fast! I really like the expression of saying that, 'I'm 18'. I love it. No, I 'loved' it. Since I can no longer say it, now.

2010

Its a year that is (so far) the most memorable one, I think. The year that I would always walk back down to remember and recall the memories that tagged along with it, both bitter and sweet. I had to let go of 2010 somehow despite how hard I want to make it stay. As if that's even possible. (sigh) A year with tears of joy, frustration, confusion, new friendships, hysterical laughters and awkward conversations; it was indeed a year to remember.

Its 2011 now. Its a new beginning of hopefully, a blissful and awesome year. (besides getting older, of course). Another year of fair choices, wise decisions, great success, accomplished resolutions and all the other beautiful things we can imagine to add up to this never-end list . Seems like a perfect picture isn't it? So, WELCOME 2011! Let's see what surprises come together with this interesting prelude that send 2010 off for good...

we are like scattered jigsaw pieces but the moment we placed together, we complete each other

2010-12-21T07:48:00.000-08:00

"Why on earth do I have to go for this camp?? dah la penat kemas rumah, bru habis xam smue... haih.,. double sigh"

If only I can take it all back,...
Samba 5 is the team that I shall never forget till the day I die. They are made up of this wonderful, too awesome, tremendous people that laugh and cry ith me throughout the five days we were together. There's no possible way to describe how much they mean to me. So, day one of Soaring The Eagle camp begins.

It was plain. the ice breaking session with my big group, Group 3, stuffed together throughout the camp in Samba 5. We were tortured to remember each and every member's name with their positive 'sirname'! So, we have:

Knowledgeable KZ (our awesome daddy!)
Naturalist Noorina (our beloved mummy/ queen ;) )
Powerful Pavalam
Excellent Ety
Ambitious Afiq
Strict Sabrina
Super Sue Yin
Steady Siew
Adamant Azu
Logical Lingesh
Humble Hafizul
Admirable Aqwa
Encouraging Ehsan
Determine Danial
Dreamer DE
Advanced Adam
Demanding Dennis
Marvelous Melisa
Attentive Anne
Lovely Liyana
Empowering Emma
Kind Ken Lin
and as for me, Nice Nadia.

We were further divided into several groups namely; Synthium, Primax, Sprinta and Mach 5.
My teammates, well, they are all guys. At first i thought I'll be having a hard time with all guys in the group but my thought wrong. They are amazing and very chill people. I'm glad to work with them and its an honour to be part of the Synthium team. Thanks guys! =)

The activities slotted in our schedule were superb! I don't even know where to begin. But I have to admit, the fascillitator did an amazing job in carrying out the activities! applauses please, people. The thing about STE that I get to bring home besides valuable experiences, great friendships, and strong bonding; is my sprained finger. ;( God has plan for us, definitely true.

A new family made, new problems shared had really eased the burden and tighten the knots that holds us together. I'm sorry guys since I had planned to put this on paper for all of you to bring back and maybe frame it or something but time doesn't allow me to do so. Thus, let me have this moment to dedicate a personal dedication to everyone in Samba 5, my newly found; family.

p/s: please read the one with your name only. Integrity counts, okay? =)

dear, Demanding Dennis (our beloved and efficient Penghulu ;) )

the first time I sa you my first impression was wow, he's charismatic and its proven hen you volunteered as the Penghulu. Honestly, you did a marvelous job and we are proud of you. The other thing is that, I never thought that we can bond this fast and since we share the same problem, I hope that you will stay strong and there'll be a happy ending at the end of this to repay your patience and sincerity. Hope I'll be there to witness it happens. I admire your listening skill as a leader as not many have it.Since you studied in Taylor's Hartamas, there is absolutely NO EXCUSE not hanging out in Subang okay! hehehe. Even when I'm writing this, I really hope we can talk and chat like nobody's business again. Miss you so much Dennis!!!

xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Excellent Ety (our talented and amazing Penghuli and a sincere friend ;))

when we met at Iftar, I already enjoyed your presence. Your sense of humor really pushes the blue and bring back the joy. I really can't imagine having to wither the conflicts alone.thanks a lot for that dear. I really enjoyed the time together with you, and the advices you gave me will always be with me as long as I live. Hope this friendship will never ever ends. By the way, you have an amazing voice! =) Hope everything works out well in your life and I'll always pray for you sayang. :) If you need anyone to talk to, I'll be here and try my very best to help okay. Hope to see you and gossips some more and hey, I really miss you and love you very much. Thanks a lot sweetheart. :D
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Powerful Pavalam (a sweet girl with a beautiful voice ;) ,

The moment I hear your voice when you speak, I was stunned to hear such beatiful voice! like, seriously. You are such a nice and sweet girl. very humble and soft spoken. I really miss you!! Don't ever dare to forget me as I shall never be able to forget you even how hard I tried. hahaha. Thanks a lot for everything Pavalam. You are really such an amazing friend and I hope no matter where we are, who we are with and how long we didn't see each other; our friendship shall remain strong. Hope to see you again, dear. Take care and all the best ;)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Ambitious Afiq (duet partner and wonderful Synthium group member)

hey afiq. Its nice to know you. thanks a lot for all your contribution for the team. you are the most chill and 'selamba' guy I've ever met! keep it up, we love you for that. thanks for making me realize that winning is not everything but having fun is what matters. =) I'm happy for you know, the thing between you and S*****a. heee. its an open secret already among us but saje nk letak star kat situ. ;P anyway, nanti makan nasi minyak jgn lupe ajak! hehehehe. Okay, whatever it is, hope our friendship last till the end of our life and hereafter. thanks again for everything and really miss you! all the best, take care. =)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Strict Sabrina (a strong girl and a loyal friend)

sayang!! first of all, rse cam xkene la nme strict sabrina tu. spttnye sweet sabrina ke..heee. btw, your dance moves, undoubtedly rocks!! I'm proud of you and maybe you can teach me easier moves one day. nak blaja lucifer to macam payah sangat je. -_-'' I really admire your courage and preserverence. It moved me in a way. InsyaAllah there's always a beautiful ending for patience. I'll pray for you and hope that all the matters will be resolved. Thanks a lot for everything dear. I really appreciate it. Its a gift to have a friend like you. I cna't imagine going through whatever that I have to go through alone. and not to forget, I'm really happy for you and a*** though. =) hope you guys find a happy ending and don't you ever forget to invite me to your wedding! nak sit VVIP okay! hehehehe. Take care dear, (xpe, klu x care pun ade orng jagekan =P ). Love u always and.. I miss u!!!!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Super Sue Yin (the cute girl with 'harapan' ;))

sue yin, you are an amazing girl I'm glad to have the chance to meet with. I think you are very soft spoken and obliging (which is totally the opposite of the past you). I'm amazed by the way you voice out your thoughts. Compose but firm. Its amazing how you can pull out that way. Anyway, whatever happens our friendship shall remain strong and pure, okay. =) All the best to you and take care okay. I miss you sue yin!!! hope we can meet again and conduct our own STE. maybe STE 2! hahahaha. =) love you dear.
xoxo,Nice Nadia

dear, Steady Siew (more like Jamal Siew the amazing vocalist!)

OMG!! Siew! I didn't know you can sing very well!! my jaw literally drop upon hearing your voice. its amazing! So, no more RM 10 for DOTA, must go kareoke! hehehehehe ;P Anyway, I'm proud of you siew! glad we can be together in this awesome camp cos if not for STE i might not know that you can sing amazingly well! Whtever it is, all the best to you and i shall see you in college again! hehehehe. Take care siew and all the best! hope we can hangout again especially in college! btw, detail me bout your "harapan" later okay!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Adamant Azu (the sweet and caring azu! )

Azu, i'm honored to meet a nice and very caring friend like you. i'm touched by the way you tried to find someone to bandage my hand. it means a lot to me, azu. All that I ant to say to you is that, people love you for who you are. there may be some who doesn't but screw them! they just lose the chance of getting to know an amazing guy ho happens to be a loyal friend too! have confidence in yourself azu, you know you can do it. if you need anything, don't hesitate to talk it over okay? we'll all be here for you. =) btw, i miss you! all the best azu, take care. hope our friendship stays no matter what might be coming ahead. ;)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Logical Linges (more like the funniest person i've met on earth!)

i can still feel the pain due to excessive laughing on the last night of STE the truth or dare and the lame game. I've never laughed so much in my entire life and thanks for that. actually, I as so nervous at that time and thanks to you, i managed to drown it down. =) I'm really glad to meet you and I hope that you fell the same way too. I can't forget your jokes especially the one with Hafizul! gosh, that's funny!! anyway, stay in touch and wherever you are don't you ever dare to forget me, okay! take care and all the best linges! miss you like god knows what! plus, maybe some time we can play those lame games again and enjoy your expression cos they're damn funny! stay funny and happy cos people love you for ho you are. ignore those who doesn't, they're jealous. =)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear,Humble Hafizul (another guy that makes my day super bright with overdosed laughter)

yes, you are super funny. you were quiet at first and slowly you start showing your true colours! and that as when we discovered the real you. thanks for being my group member and thanks for all of your contribution. Sorry if I may said anything that offended you somehow.i miss you!Its great to meet a friend like you,. Hope to keep in touch and don't you ever dare to forget me! hehehehe. all the best to you and take care! p/s, klu ade gf bgtau to clear off the 'doubts'. hehehe. kdding2. =)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Admirable Aqwa (my dearest grandson =P )

hey aqwa, i hate to admit this but you are admirable! in what sense? i don't know, your sense of humor,your ideas and wit. Its great to know you and thanks a lot for everything. btw, i owe you chocolate! (yes, i do remember :) ) i want to apologize for my wrongdoings and lame joke. hope none remains as grudge. and i don't take it personally too that grandma thingy, seriously. :) Send my regard to your beloved and nnt mkn nasi minyak ajak! You are a wonderful guy and a great friend. thanks for making synthium an amazing team together. =)i miss you! since you are staying in Hartamas, ape lg, datng la subang. heeee. all the best and take care okay!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Encouraging Ehsan ( a romantic and cute guy)

honestly, mse first time you crite pasal your family, i'm so touched. and i'm surprised mse truth or dare that I remind you of someone. then i just realized STE memang medium yg pelik to connect people. but i'm glad to be your friend. thanks for everything, i really appreciate it. you are a nice guy ehsan, and i believe you'll find somebody who will appreciate you dearly. i'll always pray for the best and don't forget to stay in touch. whatever happens, we'll still be friends.i miss you! all the best in everything you do and take care. glad i can be part of your life through STE. =)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear,Determined Danial (my rival, ex schoolmate, funny neighbour)

hahhahahahaha. biler tringat je pasal lagu satu suara version klantan, trus rase cam rndu nk ddk skali mase kt class. padahal mse kt pc dlu, i don't even have the chance to talk to you. you are an amazing guy and i really enjoyed talking nonsense with you. i'm glad we meet again despite you tried to avoid me by moving out from pc. hehehehehe. =P anyway, all the best to you and hope to keep in touch. don't you ever dare to forget me! hehehehe. maybe we shold do this again sometime, i don't know, talk nonsense to destress. =) thanks a lot and i miss you my dear neighbour!
xoxo, Nice nadia

dear, Dreamer DE ( an amazing and trustworthy groupmate )

hey DE. i'm happy to be given a chance to get to know you. you are such a supportive friend and its nice to have you in the group. your ideas are amazing! sometimes i can't even think like that. i'm sorry for everything that i did wrong and hope e'll be friends forever. all the best to you and do keep in touch okay. herever you are and whatever you do, don't ever forget me! heeheheh. btw, i miss you! hope we can meet again and maybe organize a STE2 for Samba 5. =) take care and if you have the time datang la subang! =)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Advanced Adam ( an amazing guy who changed me just by being himself)

hey. there's so much to rite about you here. but most of it i think i've already said during last night in STE. I'm sorry first of all for everything. at times, i really hope that things were different in STE and e wouldn't have to face this situation. but whatever it is, its done and i hope that whatever decision that may be coming will be the best for all. thanks a lot for everything. i really appreciate your concern and i admired your personality in a way.you are different from the guys i know.you made me realize that nobody's perfect and we have to accept others the way they are. another thins is that, i admire your honesty. all the best to you and hope to see you again. whatever that happens, we'll be stay friends and you really mean a lot to me. i miss you.
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Marvelous Melisa (a beautiful, charming, confident and gorgeous girl)

my first impression on you was, wow, she's amazingly pretty and easy going. i'm proud of you that you can endure the emotional conflict within yourself all the while. it moved me to be as strong as you are. thanks a lot for without you knowing it, i really think that you are an amazing girl and that motivates me to improve. i'm glad that we get the chance to know each other and i really hope that whatever that had been holding you back, shall be a past that you will put behind and move on for a better future.really miss you! btw, don't ever dare to forget me okay! hehheehe. all the best to you melisa and hope to see you again. maybe i'll drop by in hartamas one day. ;)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Attentive Anne (the most ambitious and strong will girl i've ever met)

i think its an open book that you will be a successful person one day. like seriously. i mean, i can totally see that by the way you walk, the ay you stand and listen and by the confidence in you. keep it up anne. and, if you finally hit it big, jgn lupe kitorng ok! hehehe. its nice to meet you anne. i learnt a lot from you and i hope that our friendship shall not end here. thanks a lot for everything and all the best to you. plus, i think maybe one day you can teach me ho to save and manage my finance. =) take care anne and stay in touch okay! i miss you a lot!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Empowering Emma (a cute junior in STE =P )

emma, at first i thought u junior but bler pk blk, mne ade junior intake lg. heeee. sorry dear. that means you are cute. its nice to know you and i'll value our friendship till the end of my life. you are very cheery and vibrant. thats what we love the most about you. since you slalu hangout kat sunway, do call me. i'll definitely be coming. all the best and take care yeah dear. i miss you already!! promise we'll hangout ok! see you soon emma! p/s: i love your green eyeliner!!! heee.=)
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Lovely Liyana (an superb mama whom i shall remember forever!)

mama, at first i thought you will be just a senior who joined our STE and probably be bored. but then you are like the super glue that sticks us together. and i literally forgot that you are older than us. you removed what so ever barriers that we have among us and made us unite as one. i'm really proud of you. when you are leaving for overseas, pleaseeee with whipped cream on top, tell us and we'll try our hardest best to wave you goodbye in KLIA. i'm very glad that we can meet each other and i really appreciate you as a wonderful friend that helped me through tough and tides. thanks a lot liyana. and, i'm sorry that i left your flower. i regret it till now. (besides my certificate and file. LOL) liyana, whatever it is, we love you and life goes on no matter how painful it is cos that's what friends are for. they hold your hands and help you move on. love you so much and i really miss you!!!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

dear, Kind Ken Lin (the guy who talked with heart and amazed all of us by that)

hye ken lin. we didn't really talked much during STE but i can feel the bond is there. and whenever we talked, there's a lot of things you impressed me with. thanks ken lin for the note on the last day. all the best to you and take care. forget me not okay, i miss you =) keep in touch and hope to see you soon!
xoxo, Nice Nadia

Despite all the weirdness, drama and tears; we all had fun. we bonded in an unexplainable way but its something that we can never forget. take care guys, i love you all. Samba 5 rocks! =)

p/s: reunion shall be discussed especially for upcoming CNY. hope to see you guys again, missing you all like crazy!!!

apologize

2010-10-23T06:05:00.000-07:00

this post is specially written to Nik Syakirah Nik Azis and Farah Lina Nor Azman

sorry can't really share the juicy secret with you both just now as I was in the car with my parents. -_-''
and obviously the issue that we ought to discuss was a 'parents-can't-know-or-else-they-will-stare-and-wonder'sort of issue. sorry, i mean; very very sorry.
=)
hope apology accepted.

p/s: let me know when i can come and visit you guys, okay!

with lots of love,
xoxo,nadia

and yes, it was love at second sight. nothing much can be expressed since no words is simple enough to illustrate such.

2010-10-17T22:12:00.000-07:00

There is something strange going on inside myself that i can hardly or can't really explain at all. I wish i know what it was. and actually, i have it still and somehow its killing me. It appers eccentric but prodigious.

Eventhough it is ultimately outlandish to have such high hope put on a complete stranger, but i can't seem to help it. Right now, the only thing i am capable of is to pray that somehow one day, this confusion shall elucidate. insyaAllah. And as for the time being, I shall be waiting or the day i finally have my dream come true. It may or may not be possible that i am willing to wait and endure the uncertainty throughout, but i shall try. I guess no harm done by that.

Lucky for me to have all those lovely people who can hold my back and tell me over and over again that this is absolutely normal and we'll pray for you. forever and always. Especially my mum; mama, you are one of a kind and I doubt that i can ever find somebody so perfect as you are. No possible words can ever be sufficient for me to express my thanks because you are the best and I will never trade that for anything.

p/s: please excuse my hormonal imbalance as this rarely ever happens to me. I really need to let it out. thank you.

with lots of love,
xoxo, nadia

if by closing my eyes tight will make me vanish, then i shall

2010-09-19T02:22:00.000-07:00

I don't know why i'm feeling so clueless right know but somehow i'm felt... lost. Don't ask me in what sense that is because i don't really know. Anyway, as much as i hate this, my assingments are piling up and i am nowhere on the starting point. Not even close.There's something I just realised that made my stomach twitched. I hate myself everytime this happens. Urgh! Thinking that my finals coming up in two months, I shall be flipping the pages of econs instead of Gossip Girl's. How I wish my life would be this simple. Unfortunately, its not. Sigh. (I sighed a lot these days for no reasons)
My brother is lost and i am blamed; (as usual) so now he shold be praying that he's not here. May I be excused for a while? I got some "questioning" to do.

xoxo, nadia

it will always evaporate even how hard you try to make it stay

2010-09-19T02:02:00.000-07:00

why people just don't get it that you need a time off? Sometimes when we think too much about others, we can't even figure out what are we thinking much of them. and yes, it makes no sense at all. the absolute meaning shall be hindered but then again, please give me break. make it a long one.

with lots of love,
nadia

Alhamdulillah, ramadhan..

2010-08-14T03:52:00.000-07:00

I still have the chance to fast and be with another Ramadhan.. Alhamdulillah.. and yes, this Ramadhan is a bit different from the previous ones because mama is performing umrah now. InsyaAllah she'll be back a week or so from now. and again, Ramadhan is to put out iman and patience to a test. I definitely need patience right now as my sister, Munirah is giving me the ultimate test of patience and strength. (please, don't ever ask me why....)

I'll definitely try my best to ensure that this ramadhan will take me to a point of chnage for the better; InsyaAllah.

Again, Salam Ramadhan al-Mubarak to every muslim and may Allah bless us with rahmah and barakah. Ameen.

its just another piece of the usual

2010-08-14T03:40:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you just feel the world revolving non-stop around you. until at one point you can never stop and take the time to understand and believe the memories and tragedies that passed. anyhow, those pieces will always stay the same no matter we capture them or let them lose.

with lots of love,

this isn't suppose to be a torture, but if it is; we never have doors to stop anyone from leaving

2010-05-31T09:39:00.000-07:00

i'm very sorry but i think for the time being, i must act like this till the time comes. sometimes, i just feel like running to the starting point and stop it from happening. but it happened so, there's no turning back.

swallow by what you are capable of not the whole lot of it. again, thanks for everything. may Allah bless you.

those tears weren't tears of joy, neither of solemn; its just blessings

2010-05-31T08:19:00.000-07:00

i never thought i will ever be given a chance to be there, in Makkah and Madinah. it was quiet a long way for me to get there, i thought. not in terms of the flight journey but its the journey of the soul that i think its just not the time yet. but alhamdulillah, i was one of the almost-two-millions guests. Allah's guests. how fortunate i was.

i went there with my grandma. it was on her, honestly. i was so happy for that and may Allah bless her and the rest of the family. ameen.

eventhough the umrah visit had passed almost 2 months, i can still recall every bit of it. who would have ever forget that? it was ineffable. i remebered the sad goodbyes from klia.. the fligh was quite nice. the foods were amazing! i sat by an arabic goverment officer that has 3 wives! no joke, he told me all about it. yes, i'm serious. he gave me his phone number to contact him if i need anything. wow, isn't that,... erm, drastic! plus, what made me feel ill at ease was, he said that he studied in malaysia and all his three wives, hate malaysia. so, they asked him to find one more wife in malaysia! yeah, i know. just don't look at me like that...

we landed safely, alhamdulillah at the airport in madinah and there was a murmur saying that erra fazira and her family were in the same trip as ours. it was proven right. she's gorgeous! by the time we arrived at the airport it was already isya'. collected our luggages and another drama begun. our bags, were really heavy (mmg sure la kan..) and the airport trolley is some kind of a busness opportunity for the people there. they help to load all the bags for you and help to push them to your bus and you pay. so, what happens was, we had this one guy to the deal. he pushed the trolley loaded with huge trunks to our bus which happen to be quite distant from the terminal. so, when we finally get there, he asked for the pay. it was 50 riyal! we were quite shocked! aunty ita, (one of the jemaah from out group) gave him 10 riyal. he said no. so, we add up to that about 5 riyal more and he refused to accept; insisting for a 50. so, we ignored and went on board. he followed us and went to scan the whole bus for us and when he finally locate us, he was angry and demand for the money. so, our mutawwir had to come in and settle it. that was quite scary for my first experience. i can still picture his face clearly in my mind. -_-'

me and saliha (a new friend of my age who happens to know my other friends too), share the same atrocious scene at the airport as a first-timer. we went pass masjid nabawi, it was celestial. i can't help tears rolling down to see such an amazing view. i feel blessed. during our stay there, i'm glad that i got the chance to go to raudhah almost everyday. alhamdulillah. the arabic women guards at masjid nabawi (eventhough they wears hijab), they were very beautiful. you can tell from their eyes. i sneaked in my phone to take pictures. we are not allowed to do so actually.

trips to the masjid, shop a little bit here and there, eat bakso (can't believe they have bakso there)then 3 days went by.

to makkah we went. we went to makkah by bus and arrived there around 9 p.m (if i'm not mistaken). so, we changed and then get ready for our first umrah. the moment i stepped in masjidil haram, the feelings were just different and special. one can never tell before he or she stepped in that position, standing on the cold marble floor of masjidil haram and look at kaabah. its not the same when we looked at pictures or read books about it compared to see kaabah with our own eyes. its very atypical. that was the best moment in my life.

we did our umrah and were done at 3+ am. so, subuh will be just around the corner, so we decided to stay there. and i went to look for our (me and my grandmother's) shoes. so, my grnadmother recited the quran while me and mak teh ( another jemaah from my group) went to find the slippers. we failed because we didn't remeber the shoe rack number. so that's the end of it. suddenly, i just had the idea to kiss hajarul aswad. mak teh tagged me along. it was barmy! everybody was pushing one another and strive their hardest best to kiss the black stone. mak teh got it first before i did. but alhamdulillah, Allah answered our prayers. but my grandmother was so worried at that time. sorry for that, i should have told her first, my bad.

so, the days went by. we went to the dates farm, quran printing, camels riding and more visits. it was wonderful. i miss the tranquility in the two masjids; masjid nabawi and masjidil haram.

in conclusion, i hope to go there again and improve my ibadah from now onwards; insyaAllah.

give us ANOTHER millions of years where we will never know how to end this (part two)

2010-03-20T14:28:00.001-07:00

sorry to take such a lontg time to post the remaining.. heee~

GERALDINE UNA JETONY (geraldine dear!! =) )

ger, first thing first, I MISS YOU!!! i can still remember the time in putra where the pillow talk happened! hahhaah. who can ever forget that? trashing into other people's room and make noise! hahahaha. -_-'. i really hope you do enjoy this two weeks with all of us and DO KEEP IN TOUCH!! (i will never forgive you if you ddnt)... anyway, all the best in your life and take care yeah. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

FAZMEY FELIX LIANGSON (tepuk2 terima kasih and all the other tepuks that you can ever think of!)

fazmey, I MISS THOSE TEPUKS!! feel like coming back to PKTR and do it all over again. thanks a lot for everything. PKTR will never be the same without you. plus, i still remember the story you told us bout your ex and the suicide attempt, that was very honest and brave of you. and whatever it is, DO KEEP IN TOUCH! all the best and take care , miss you! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

UMMI MUMAIZZAH SIDIK (a*****n's darling! =) )

dear ummi, I MISS YOU!!! i used to adore your time management especially when you have the time to do your make up and all while we were so deadly buzy in pktr. haih, great job! thanks a lot for everything and i'm sorry if i did anything wrong. all the best to you and keep in touch kayh. take care dear! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ROLAND TEO YII LIN (the person who made me adore music =) )

dear roland, I REALLY MISS HEARING YOU PRACTISE YOUR VIOLIN!! you rocks at it! thanks a lot yeah. I really appreciate the colabration of hijau and your group during charity. you guys had been part of us, like a really big family! DO KEEP IN TOUCH! all the best in life and don't you ever ever forget me kayh! take care.

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MOHD NAZRIN SERIN (the person who made the loudest kenyalang voice for sumazau! )

nazrin, thanks for the sumazau dance tutor. it was fun! and I REALLY MISS YOU and the loud sound that you made during the dance!!! whatever it is, all the best and do keep in touch! take care. whenever you come here in semenanjung, just give me a buzz and we'll hangout with the others as well kayh! hope to see you in AYTR sometime. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

RICHEL RICK FOO (my dear richel bah! =) )

RICHEL, I MISS YOU AND YOU BAHS!!! you are such a nice and sweet girl. do keep that up yeah. we love you for who you are. do come here and lepak with us sometime. thanks a lot for being a very nice friend for me and the other PKTRians throughout this two weeks and i hope we can preserve this bond FOREVER! keep in touch and ALL THE BEST DEAR!!! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

FALIQ ASRAF JAFRI (one of the responsible biro kebajikan =) )

dear faliq, this two weeks had given me more than enough time to know you for such a very considerate and humble person. you did a really great job as the welfare biro. I MISS YOU YELLING OUT FOR SICK PEOPLE!! i know it sounds weird but i do miss it. keep in touch and all the best in life. take care and hope to see you again. thanks for everything. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ADELYN FOO YIN YIN (adelyn darling! =) )

let me say this first, I MISS YOU A LOT!!! come here and meet me laa... i will never ever forget you and the rest of pktrians. DO KEEP IN TOUCH and forgive me for everything yeah. thanks for being such a magnificent friend all this while and we'll always be friends kayh! all the best and hope to see you some other time.. =) take care.

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

TIARA ABDULLAH (one of my precious hijau group member)

dear tiara, I MISS YOU A LOT!! you are such a unique and interesting person. i mean, the way you see things and make a point in discussions, they're amazing! I really wish we can stay in the group forever.. but, all of us have our own life to go on with. so, all the best to you and let this friendship stay forever. take care and all the best. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

PETRINA ALAM (the best director in the whole universe! =) )

PETRINA DEAR, I MISS YOU!!! seriously, i miss your accent and everything.. sobs. come here, let me know adn let's hangout!!! thanks for everything and i'm sorry if i ever made you hurt. btw, you did an amazing job as our director! congrats and keep it up! PROUD OF YOU DARLING!! take care and don't ever dare to forget me! LOVE YOU!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NATALEA RAYMOND (a graceful dancer =) )

NAT, MISS YOU!!! MISS YOU A LOT! especially when i can't dance with you anymore. no more zapin, joget or waltz.. sigh. but whatever it is, DO KEEP IN TOUCH! let this pktr bond stay with all of us forever yeah. thanks for everything. especially the sumazau, it was great! all the best to you dear and take care. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

JOEL JUSTIN ANAK GEORGE (my darling brother)

joel, I MISS YOU A LOT LAA!! your jokes, the laughs, being hilarious, go crazy, miss all of these!! i really miss your hi~~ jau! thanks for being such an enjoyable and a great friend for this two weeks and for a lifetime after this. let's hangout some time. do come here okayh! all the best to you and take care,. plus, DON'T YOU EVER DARE TO FORGET YOUR BELOVED SIS HERE OKAYH! keep in touch yeah dear,..

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

DOOHAN JEMSY (a very soft spoken friend =) )

doohan, i'm sory for being too loud. i hope you enjoyed pktr as much as i do and really hope to see you again. you are such a nice fiend to be with and i'm glad that we met in pktr. I REALLY MISS YOU! take care yeah, and all the best. keep in touch and don't ever forget me for whatever reasons! heheh. kddng. =) btw, I LOVE YOUR TRADITIONAL COSTUME, no jokes. its nice. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

GERALD KEN ANAK SALI (a very nice and sweet friend i met in pktr)

dear gerald, i know we don't really talk much to each other in pktr but i think we made a pretty good friends. and honestly, I MISS YOU! feel like going back and introduce myself again and start the two weeks all over. but whatever it is, keep in touch yeah. all the best and don't forget me, hopefully you won't. take care and hope to see you again some time. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

last but not least,

dearest

KHAIRUL ANWAR AB. GHANI (abang khairul , our dear brother)

dear abang khairul, MISS YOU A LOT!!! can't believe that i'm gonna wake up without your voice calling us and telling us what's next. awh, miss it!! i can still remeber the day you called me and said that i got it and i was so happy! that's how tha wonderful two weeks started for me.it was a great memory.but, whatever it is, we will keep in touch right? and i really hope we will. all the best to you and take care. hope to see you again and maybe you can treat us luch or anything. hahahaha. =P i hope we did came out just like what you wished to shape us. you did a great job as a 'pemudah cara' ( i like this term =) ) and most of all as our dearest brother . i'll never ever forget you. thanks and apologies for everything. =)

with lots of love,nadia. xoxo

finally, i managed to post this up and i hope you guys have the time to scroll and find your name. every single thing that i write here is sincerely from me and what i experienced with you guys throughout the two weeks together. I LOVE YOU GUYS AND THANKS FOR BEING THE PIECES THAT COMPLETED PKTR 2009 TO BE ONE OF THE BEST THING IN MY LIFE.

xoxo, nadia.

give us millions of years where we will never put this to an end (part one)

2010-03-09T02:33:00.000-08:00

yes, the two weeks had ended. meaningfully i shall say. two weeks are all it takes to bond us together in a sense where we can never explain. from the very first day at Kompleks Rakan Muda Bukit Kiara, most of us had been chatting and talking like we had known each other for years! Its kinda funny but we like it that way. Then we got the chance to know abang Khairul (whom i used to call 'Mr. Khairul') in person. such a very nice brother. all the activities done keep us closer and bring us together as a big family.

we met many eminent figures whom of course we don't get to see everyday. duh! getting the chance to go to for visits in high rank places also part of the distinguished memories. well, i love to quote this to everyone of us in PKTR; its not about how close or far we are today, also not about the time we had a day, but the bond and thoughts that keep us together for the past two weeks are enough to make every single one of us precious. without one of us, the rest can never stand alone. with all of us as one, we are no longer just a team; we are a family.

well, since i don't have the time to send a personal message via letters to all of you guys, i would like to post this to every single one of you here, in this very blog.

p/s: please read the one with your name only okay. thanks.

CHIN ZAO HAN (aunty chea aka monkey)

aunty!! i can't believe the two weeks are so over! i will miss everything about you. i still remember the first day when i only know you for the sake of you being the only participant from perlis. then we were placed in a team together. all of us made a pretty good team and undevidable family. the dinner with jeffry chea remember? it was hillarious! we had such a laugh plus good food through the night! i missed that moments. not to forget your cheer, 'banana peel up, rachel!' hahahaa. miss this laa. please, pretty please with double cheese and cream on top; DO KEEP IN TOUCH!!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

DICKSON LAU (my buses supporter)

dickson, i'll miss u laa!! correction. I'M MISSING YOU ALREADY!! we had such a laugh bout my keep-changing-colours buses. sorry for the blue bus anyway. hahahaha. that disco in the bus was splendid! thanks for everything dickson. and when i say everything, i do mean EVERYTHING! from being my dearest bus supporter to helping me out with my cramped feet to loving my fashion show!, being a loyal photographer.. we love you!

with lots if love, nadia. xoxo

NUR HAZEERAH HASHIM (hazee penang)

hazee, tak tau la nak habaq apa da kat hang nie,. but definitely missing u now and always! thanx a lot for everything. seronok dapat kenai hang! (chewah, btol ke tak ape aku cakap nie, hahahaa). but whatever it is, keep in touch and never let go of this strong bond that we have among us. see you whenever its possible. kampung kan dekat! nanti sama2lah kita ziarah-menziarah antara satu sama laen! hehehehe. kalau ade rezeki, jumpe hang kat penang naa!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

CHAN BING KIT (jovial jessie)

although we had never been directly linked whether in a group or project work, we can always amile and talk about random stuff together. i think you are such an easy going and a very nice person to be with. really hope that we can meet and gather as a big family again one day and include yourself yeah! i'm missing you already!!! whatever means there is, KEEP IN TOUCH!! thanx a lot for being my family for two weeks and forever after. see you yeah!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

KISOR THAIALA RAO (kishow, my joget dance partner)

at first i never thought that i will somehow involved with you since that you are the quiet one and i am, well you know.. hahaha. but then, when we were in HIJAU together, i can't believe you are a person with such sense of humor! you are such a nice person to be with and a warm company. plus, you are a great listener too. remember when wa had discussions, you will be the one who speaks the least but when you voice out something, they're brilliant! i will miss you a lot kishow. the joget dance at the orang asli were marvellous! thanks a lot! btw, when you finaly have facebook, ADD ME AND KEEP IN TOUCH! (please make one!)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NG EE VON (ee von, mew!)

yes woman, my sime darby book is full of your MEWS! hahahaa. i miss it laa!! so badly, i tell you! we were close since the first day when you became shakira's roomate at kiara. since then, i kept going to ur room and share stuffs. (secret ah, those stuff. winkwink*) its cool and awsome to know u ee von! i really wish to death that i can study in taylor's so we can meet up!!! pray for me ahh.. ! we became HIJAU family and having you in was CRAZY!! we talked bout random things and came up with donkey jokes! aiyo! miss that also!!! and and, remeber when we were at petronas, and you were wearing that office suit and i tell you that i met somebody working at a a bank who look just like you!! (can't remember which bank, though) and you told me that you have a sister working at that bank! hillarious! miss the days in camp with you as my camp mate and my water rafting mate! your shouts in the raft was so loud man! then came the mines when we went to buy drinks and came back with shoes and cardies instead! how they were so jealous of us! hahahaah. we have to meet up and catch some movies or anything.

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ARIFF KAMAL KHAIRI ZULKAFLI ( YB berpotensi tinggi)

yb, eventhough we were'nt actually been grouped together or anything, i really take you as part of the family and i appreciate your role as a yb in pktr! seriously, you look and sound like a yb and hopefully you will be one later. bile da jadi yb tu jgn plak lupa kat cheq na! hhahaaha. miss ur accent! hopefully, one day we, (me, hazee, husna and you) can go out together in penang or wherever laa.. thanks a lot for everything and DO KEEP IN TOUCH!! jadilah pemimpin yang baik.. all the best to you!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

CARYN LIM TSUJEAN (a decent girl in pktr)

dear caryn, i always adore you for such an etiquette manners of yours. you are very soft spoken and lemah-lembut that one day (which i don't know when) i can be just like you. pray that i will okay! hehehee. it might takes years or so, who knows. do you still remember the time in kiara when aisyah slept at my room and i have to sneak into your room and woke you up? heee. sorry bout that yeah? i'm sorry if you can't stand my talkings and attitude. i really miss you a lot! hope we can see each other again yeah!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

TEH TAT HOW (my dearest MOH! =P)

how! i really miss you laa, my HIJAU family member! i can still remember the day out with the orphans when one of them suddenly came up to me and ask 'kakak, siapa abang MOH?' i was like, WHAT?? hahaaha. that was funny! thanks a lot yeah how for making me felt like home for the past two weeks with your friendliness and warm attitude. btw, i really love your accent when you talk. its just so CUTE!! and remember the poetry performance, it was WONDERFUL! i really wish that we can meet up and chat some more.. hope to see you again tat how! (p/s: send my regard to your girlfriend yeah. hehehe =P)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

DIANA HANISHHA JEFRI (dearest biro kebajikan! hehehe)

'ade siapa2 saket tak?'. hahahaah. miss that laa, seriously! you made a wonderful biro kebajikan. keep up the good work in your other commitments later yeah. i really miss the day when you came into my room at kiara and we talked bout the stuff in ky, remember?? rindu gler!! my first impression on you was you are such a beautiful girl. with that wide smile and all. you such a fun person to be with. the jokes, selamba je and very friendly. since we already have a connection, i'm hoping that we can make it last. its nice to know you dear! all the best yeah!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MOHAMAD NABIL FADHLULLAH SAIFUDDIN (anak kolek =) )

nabil, thanks for everythng for the past two weeks. a nice father of HIJAU family i shall say. i used to be very annoyed with mckk and surprisingly, you changed that. i'm sorry bout the tag issue and keeping you so attached to it. hahahaa. but, its okay la kan.. once in a while. hope to see you as a datuk in 10 years from now. good luck with that. you are such a fun person to be with. i mean, very wisdom and full of facts. so different from me. i talk craps, yeah i know. thats just the way i am. and again i'm sorry sebab i earsdropped your conversation with elin. hehehe. i hope you had a wonderful two weeks just like i did. all the best to you in life and DO KEEP IN TOUCH, dato' nabil! heee. thanks for giving me the chance to know you and add up some craziness and laughters to your "formalities". hope you don't mind. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NURUL AQILAH AQILUDEEN (lalalalalala hehehe)

lala, miss you la!!!! thanks for everything in pktr! you rock i tell you! dalam diam2 pn you can crack such a stomach bursting joke! i love it. even though we rarely speak to each other but i know the connection is strong cus when we sit together we can just talk like nobody else's bussiness! hahahaha. fun times. you are so selambe that i can just join in your converstion whenever i feel like it without any akwardness! cool right? so, all the best in your life and so on. i will definitely remember you and DO KEEP IN TOUCH, by whatever means there are!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

HANA ATIKAH HAMZAH (hana re!)

hana!!! come back laa!! miss u!! sorry to yell but, I REALLY MISS CALLING YOU HANA RE!!! pray that i get the chance to study at taylor's then we all can go hangout together kayh! thanks for the tudung yeah. heheheh. all the best to you hana and DON'T YOU EVER DARE TO FORGET ME! don't get me wrong ywah, not trying to threat you but... ermm... heee.. lost already.. nvmnd. keep in touch yeah darling.!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

CHOON XIN YI (dearest xin yi)

xin yi, the nice and sensitive girl in my pktr dictionary. i miss you laa xin yi!! i used to get confused between you and jessie once but i got it right already now! hahahah. funny laa. thanks a lot for everything yeah. hope you get the best of your life and don't ever ever forget me!! really wish to see you again and I REALLY REALLY MISS YOU!!! keep in touch and never ever in your life stay out from the pktr 09 family! i mean it! take care and all the best! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NUR HUSNA SHAIK HUSSEIN (husna yg sgt menjiwai sajak! =) )

husna, I MISS YOU!! seriously.. nanti bila2 cheq balik penang jumpa hang kat sana na! tapi bila2 hang mai kl kte lepak sini la plak. heheheh. thanx for everything and i will always remeber you. ingat tak mase kita jd satu team untuk charity project ngan orphans tu? it was such a meaningful experience. rindu moments tu. a lot. i really don't know how to describe the thing between all of us in pktr but being one of them is... beyond words. all the best and take care. DON'T FORGET THIS DATIN OKAYH! hehehe. dan lagi tu.. haisyh. but whatever it is, its been really nice to know you!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

CHONG YEE SIN (esin, di sini! (your verse in the sajak))

esin, imissyouimissyou!!! i never thought we can be this close to evrybody and i'm glad we can make it as a family now. i really wish we can meet each other again. and i know we will. all the best in your life after this and recover from that "post-pktr" syndrome we are suffering from! hehehe, as if we can, i doubt it! but take care yeah and DON'T EVER FORGET ME AND PKTR!! for we will never forget you! btw, great job on that pic of abg khairul riding a bike! its a bomb now! hahhaha. do keep in touch and...see you yeah esin!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MOHAMMAD HIJAZ ADENAN (bapa FOCUS! =) )

FOCUS,FOCUS! hahaha.. its da trademark that we all miss in pktr 09. thanks for your wonderful job as biro agama. all of us appreciate that. all the best in life and keep up that good work in everything you do. take care and DON'T EVER LOSE FOCUS! hehehhehe. have fun at the same time, don't ever push that aside. keep in touch and may Allah bless you and all of us, insyaAllah. =)

with lots of love and FOCUS, nadia. xoxo

NUR LIYANA MUHAMAD (datin chong wei! )

liyana, i didn't know that you have such a deep passion for badminton till that night you told us! you shpuld have told us earlier laa! so that i can shout your name when i met chong wei in kiara! haiya! too late laa.. hehehee. you have such an interesting personality to share and i will never forget you. so, YOU KEEP ME IN MIND YEAH! hehehehe. its nice to know you and i really hope that we will meet each other again after this. i miss you laa datin chong wei!! you take care okay, and all the best!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NIRMALATIBAN PARTHIBAN (tibantiban =)) )

tiban, eventhough you refused to be my partner for joget but, I STILL LOVE YOU LAA! hahahaha. funny laa you. you are such a nice person and i enjoy your company. thanks a lot yeah. and please, pretty please forgive me for being so annoying! hahaha. i really hope to meet you again someday or to make it clear, AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! don't ever forget me yeah tiban! i'll kill you if you do! hahaha. jkngjkng*.i miss you so much! take care and all the best in life. may you be a successful person one day! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

SITI AISYAH MOHD RAMLI (an inspiring figure)

aisyah, from the very first day i met you (during interview at memorial), i always thought you are such an inspiring person. you still are now to me. =) MISS YOU A LOT!!! its been a pleasure to know you and hope our bond will never die. i hope that whatever we had gone through in pktr will always remain as the sweetest memories in your life, as it will in mine. you did a relly great job as a biro agama in pktr. good job on that! thank you for your help and advices. i will keep that in mind and use it wisely. thanks a lot, i really appreciate it. hope to keep in touch and may all of us be successfull in life and so on!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

DEBORAH ANNE JOHN PHILIP (deb darling =) )

deb, i miss you!!! hope to see you again! i really meant it~ thanks a lot for being such a sweet friend in pktr for all of us! whatever it is, DO KEEP IN TOUCH!! i know i said it a lot but i really miss you people! we can talk and laugh practically on EVERYTHING!! so cool right?! i miss it laa.. all 68 of us together.. take care of yourself and all the best yeah deb! we are staying nearby la,.. hope to catch some movies later kayh? miss you!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

KIRUDARSHINI BALAKRISHNAN (model-like kiru! =) )

kiru, i really miss you!!! you are such a nice freind indeed. and YES, i envy your figure!! you are just so tall and looks like a commercial model! share me your diet yeah! hahahah. jkngkng* thanks for everything kiru, i really appreciate it. don't forget me kayh. take care and all the best. DO KEEP IN TOUCH BY ANY MEANS POSSIBLE! hope to see you again! miss you kiru!!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NUR HIDAYAH ABDUL RAZAK (dayah comel! =) )

dayah, miss you!! well, practically i miss everybody and i know EVERYBODY MISS ME!! hahaha. gurau2. but seriously, nak balik pktr and organize the dayout with the orphans lg skali! btw, about the adress please remind me from time to time yeah. i will try to get it for you. thanks a lot for everything. its nice to meet and know you in person. i really hope to see you again and do keep in touch! all the best to you dayah!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

KELLY LIM SIN EE (a very outspoken person =) )

its really nice to know you kelly and i will never forget such a wonderful person like you. i really thank pktr to unite us and everybody else. YOU GUYS ARE SO COOL!! i always admire you for being so brave and outspoken. you help me to voice out my thoughts and i want to thank you so much for that. remember the day when my feet cramped in the forest, you helped me out and made me feel okay to actually cramped my feet! hahaha. thanks yeah, really appreciate it. btw, about the gunung berapi night, i do hope you didn't take it personally because i don't have any reason to actually vote you out. i have no reasons to vote anybody from HIJAU out. you guys are like my family. KELLY, I MISS YOU!! take care and i really hope to see you again. all the best and forget me not!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

DAYANITTA SIVADASS (the one who owns everybody in pktr =P )

'afiq!' (say it out in your tone) i miss that a lot!! since that NOBODY had ever called afiq that way, i SALUTE YOU LAA!! hhahahahaa.. seriously la daya, I MISS YOU!! still remember tha time when you climb off from joel's bed and ran your fingers through your hair, it looks so wrong man!!!!! hahahaha. and when you claimed EVERYBODY is yours! its so funny!!!but whatever it is, don't ever ever forget me and do keep in touch ya. all the best to you. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ELINAR YASMEEN MUHAMMAD AZMI (my tentmate, water rafting mate and hotelmate =))

ELIN I MISS YOU A LOT!!! its just so weird waking up alone and.... EARLY! hahhahaah. remeber how we 'terbabas' during our stay at the hotel? expected aite? i still remeber out quotation 'when you put elina and nadia together,...' ( the rest is all yours! hahaha) i wish you had a great time just like i did. and since we are staying kinda close to each other, THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO REAsON FOR US NOT TO GO OUT!! hahahah. i mean it, really hope to hangout someday.. you did a great job as the penghuluwati and had been a very nice and bestest friend indeed. thanks a lot. i really wish that we can keep laughing about everything and always stays together but what's there left to say... two weeks are over but i hope that our friendship will remain. so does with all the HIJAU family member and everyone else! I LOVE YOU!!all the best (with your love life esp.) and take care... I MISS YOU!!! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NAUFAL NASIHIN AHMAD ZABIDI (a very down to earth penghulu =) )

dearest penghulu, thanks for being such a great leader to all of us. its not easy to lead leaders and to me you did a really great job! applauses people! hehhe. i'm sorry if i did anything that annoyed or hurt you. keep up the good work and all the best to you! remain FOCUS in life and don't forget to HAVE FUN!! remeber the time we were so cooperative in the kayak? one two, one two! hahaha. miss that..i miss you a lot naufal!!! take care and hope to see you again!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

HARDITH SINGH MANDER RANJEET SINGH (the best dancer in this whole universe!)

I MISS YOUR DANCING!! the way you forst introduce yourself, we know we are going to hurt our neck so badly trying to follow your head shake! hahahah. the team up during charity project was cool!! and i'll never forget that hardith lost to some kids doing some random shuffle moves! hahaha. thanks for everythign yeah. all the best with your shipping company! do keep in touch and i will NEVER EVER FORGET YOU!! plus, maintain your loyalty and don't tolerate your integrity. take care.. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ALYA IMAN ABDUL MANAB (someone who look much like irma hasmie)

alya, my dear neighbour at kiara! hehehe. its nice to know you and i hope we will keep in touch. I MISS YOU!! take care dear and all the best! we have two links now, one as the ansara of mrsm and the other one is aytr of 2009!!! its great right? hope to see you soon and please forgive me for all my wrongdoings and have a nice day! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

RACHEL CHEW SU-ANN (one of the three nice rachels! =) )

at first, i was confused between you and auty chea and richel! then sort things out, and i'm fine. nice knowing you guys! i still had the night of the singing audition in mind. it was so cool!! hahaha. miss it laa.. all the best and take care yeah. don't forget this datin ar!! hehehe. I MISS YOU!!! hope to see you again and may you have a successful life ahead!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

TAN JIA FU (my dearest headcount partner)

MISS HEADCOUNTING AND MANAGING THE TRIPS WITH YOU!! seriously, you are such a friendly and nice person to be with. i want to thank you for the smooth and pleasant trip. thanks for the help and i am sure we made a pretty good team, right? i can see you nodding! hehehe. you are just so funny and easy going. i can't forget the 'fuki', your scandal with nasuha and everything laa!!! take care and promise me we will meet again okay? i miss you!!! and all the best. DON'T YOU EVER DARE TO FORGET ME, JIA FU!! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NIK AZWAN HAFIZULLAH NIK ABDULLAH (all time playboy =P )

is it a coincident that you and jia fu are on top of each other in the programme book?? haisyh, scandalous! btw, its nice to know you nik. you are such a great friend and i never thought you can be that easy going and funny!! seriously, no jokes. miss the dance; zapin la, joget la, gemuruh jiwa da most! I MISS YOU!! hope to keep in touch and hang out later. all the best in life. and when its time for kenduri nasi minyak with q*&, don't forget to invite me! hahahaha. jkng2* anyway, take care and avoid any other accidents with the sliding door! hehehe. do keep in touch! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MELWYN PAK YONG HO (setiausaha sulit penghulu =P )

LET'S GO FOR ANOTHER PKTR LAA, I MISS YOU!!! seriously, i feel like going back! i actually learnt a lot from you. and i will value everything. thanks a lot for everything especially the time when i got cramp in the hutan there. i really appreciate it. its nice to know you and during the two weeks, you had been such a great friend. hope it will last through the rest of our lives. take care and all the best! and i still don't have the answer to your question, 'who is the dato'?' i'll tell you when i do have the answer yeah! hahahaah. FORGET ME NOT! keep in touch and hope to see you again! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

KAU MEI KEE (the cutest mickey ever! =) )

MISS YOU LAA MEI KEE!!! you are just so cute, you know! and a good friend too! hope we can be friends forever and i believe the 2 weeks prove it. do keep in touch and be yourself wherever you go, people will love you. all the best in life and so on. its really hard to say goodbye but we have facebook and whatever communication medium, so use it and KEEP IN TOUCH! don't forget me yeah mei kee.. stay FOCUS and all the best of luck! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MUHAMMAD SYAMIL ASYRAN SUHAIMI (abg syamil~ )

i'm sorry first of all if whatever i did annoyed you. thanks for everything especially helping us all out with the zapin. thanks.i still remeber the time when you were the ketua kampung, it was hillarious! you were a good actor! hahahaha. this 2 weeks had been wonderful for me and i hope it was for you too. we had been together in a family and i hope it will stay this way forever.and i still remember the time in the plantation, 'mnakutkan tapi manis'. hahaha. all the best for everything and take care. you are such a great friend and i enjoyed the jokes and laughter all the way! and I MISS YOU!! hope to see you again some time. keep in touch okay!

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NUR AISHAH AHMAD KAMAL (my lovely roomate in kiara!)

aishah, thanx for being such a nice friend and roomate! i'm sorry for being too loud.. but you are such a nice an patient roomate. hope our friendship will last and please do keep in touch! MISS YOU LAA AISHAH!! all the best and take care yeah. i will always remember you and always do your very best in everything. you are such a beautiful friend inside out and i know you will have tons of friends throughout your life. thanks for the beautiful memory. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ANGELA GOH QUI CIAN (nice little angel! =) )

angela, its been nice to know you and the two weeks we spent together was wonderful! the feelings bout it i believe can't be explained but deeply felt by all. thanks for everything. and for sure, I MISS YOU A LOT!! i wish we can go back to the time where we camp out, have a lot of trips here and there and share the jokes on the bus! seriously, miss them all!!! all the best to you angela and take care. DON'T FORGET TO KEEP IN TOUCH!! very important, that one! hahahha. i hope yor feet are okay already and let the pain be washed away but make sure the memory stays. all the best! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NUR AFZA QISTINA MOHD FADZIL (qis , mrs *** =P)

dear qis, i can't believe the two weeks had passed! it had been a great 2 weeks though. the day you became a 'postwomen' between me n 'him' was so funny! then we suddenly shared a point about the thing we have in common. (that one you recall yourself laa okay. ) its nice to know you qis and i hope we will maintain this pktr cycle forever. all the best in life and have great days ahead. I LOVE YOU QIS!! hope to see you soon, miss you!!! btw, don't forget to let me know yeah, bout the kenduri nasi minyak later on! hahahaha. winkwink*

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MUHAMMAD AFFRRIN BIRING (u**'s prince charming =P )

affrrin, its been a splendid two weeks in pktr and i really appreciate our time together. i miss the acting 'syok sendiri' kat backstage hri2. psal cincin laa, so on and whatever. hahaha. seriously, klaka gler! miss you!! it's really nice to know you. all the best in your life and good luck with that someone yeah. hehehe. hope to see you soon and KEEP IN TOUCH! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NURAINAA AYUNI UHAMMAD NASIR (ayu.....ni... =D )

I'M GONNA MISS YOU A LOT!!! you are such a nice and a very humble friend. its nice to know you and i really hope we can meet each other again. plus, don't forget to finish your whole lot of bunch of ubats!! hahaha. all the best and take care yeah. do keep in touch and have a very nice day ahead. don't ever erase me from your memory! love you! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

ABDUL SHAKIR FAKHRI ADNAN (penghulu orang asli =) )

its nice to know you shakir and i really love your sense of humor! thanks for everything and all the best in life. don't ever forget me and do keep in touch. the two weeks really brought me to know the funny, lovable and friendly shakir. i hope you stay the same way all your life for people will really love you for who you are. hope to see you again and take care. plus, stay FOCUS! hehehe

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

FATIN NUR AMIRAH MOHD FARIDZA ( fatin who has such a nice specs! love it! =) )

fatin, I MISS YOU!!! i used to confused myself between you and suha! sorry bout that but i got it right now, don't worry. despite this 2 weeks had ended, all the memories as a big family of pktr will always be there. thanks a lot for everything. all the best in life and good luck.keep in touch!! hope to see you again and have a nice day! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NASUHA SALEHON (jia fu's temporary girlfriend =P )

nas, MISS YOU!! i still had a good laugh thinking of how you confessed mase birthday surprise tu. 'ape salah awk?' (abg tengku) 'xdela, sy ingat sebab sy asyik ngan jia fu je' (nas). omg, that was so funny!!! hahaha. but i miss those days.. thanks for being our zapin instructer! it was so cool!! take care yeah. all the best and KEEP IN TOUCH!! hope to see you again. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

AIMI NABILA NORDIN (the person who owns that lovely hairstyle =) )

aimi!! we found each other and chat before pktr but its even better when we met during pktr! it was so much fun!! i sat with your parents during closing ceremony and they told me loads of things bout u! jengjeng! hahahaha. send my regards to them. the two weeks means a lot to me and i hope the same goes to you. all the best and i hope this connection remains between all of us. I MISS YOU LAAA!!! seriously, i want to go back to pktr! but its not possible anymore, right? so, take care yeah and hope to see you soon! =)

with lots of love,nadia. xoxo

TAN CHOON HWA (a very lively and bubbly person i met in pktr! =) )

choon hwa, thanks a lot for everything and thanks fr being a very nice friend. i miss you a lot!! and i hope we can meet each other again someday.. all the best and take care yeah! forget me not and treasure the two weeks we spent together in pktr. DO KEEP IN TOUCH! plus, i'm sorry if i ever hurt you through this programme and i really enjoyed your company. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

WAN AHMAD AFIQ ZAULKAFLI (dearest ex-schoolmate and daya's darling =P )

afiq, its been really nice to see you again after the long hols. the two weeks brought me into knowing the 'real' afiq. somebody who no longers hold the burden of a headboy, somebody do free and lively. its so much nicer to be with you when you took off your 'mask'. but, i know you are such a great leader and i know its not easy for you to bear your responsibilities but i'm glad you had fun during this 2 weeks! SO DO I! again, do keep in touch and all the best to you, DR.AFIQ. may all your dreams come true. take care and hopr to see you again. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MAXINE CHUA MEI ZIN (max mummy!!)

MAX!!! I MISS YOU LAA MUMMY!!! i still remember the day when we first met during the interview. we got along quiet well. then we both got it and i was so happy! its nice to know you and i hope our friendship remains till the end of time. take care yeah mummy, all the best. don't forget me kayh! i wish the two weeks will go on so that we can spend more time together. i really hope it does but what can we do... thanks a lot yeah mummy! I LOVE YOU!!! whatever you do, just be yourself. all of us love you the way you are.. hope to see you again..

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NUR AIN NABILAH ROSLI (ain, z**'s sweetheart =P)

ain, my datin partner!! I MISS YOU!! thanks for everything. the tudung, brooches and so on. thanks a lot! all the best and take care. don't ever ever forget me! keep in touch through any way possible!! i love your cardigan, your laughter and the talkings. those things that made me happy. keep it up yeah. hope to see you soon~ =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NAZIHA NURHANI (ziha, somebody so sincere)

first of all, apology if i did anything wrong. it had been a pleasant two weeks with you and i wish it had been two months or two years, i don't mind. I MISS YOU!! seriously, i wish to go back to pktr. i really hope that the bond we build in pktr will stay with us forever and all the best to you. take care and keep in touch. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

MUHAMMAD ZULHELMI AMRAN (zul, a**'s prince charming =P )

zul! thanks a lot for the wonderful two weeks together. thanks for helping me out during the jungle trekking. big time. you are such a humble and an easy going person. somebody who i can talk to about whatever thing that i feel like talking about. its nice to know you and i hope our friendship will last. do keep in touch and, honestly I REALLY MISS YOU NOW!! with all your jokes and sense of humor, i enjoyed the tiring jungle trekking with such a good laugh! hahahahah. all the best and take care yeah. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

YEO ZHI MING (shakira's temporary husband! =P)

zhi ming, i never thought that you are so funny and fun to be with because at first i thought you were very quiet. remeber at the opening ceremony we sat at the same table? you were kinda quiet and later on i dicovered that you are just so hillarious!! seriously, i love that. I MISS YOU ZHI MING!! miss all your jokes and whatever else. thanks for making this two weeks a fun and an enjoyable one! do take care and avoid falling on the road again yeah.. heheh. sorry bout that. all the best to you and have a nice day. =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NURUL KAMILAH MAT KAMIL (kam, my seashells collector! )

KAM, I MISS SEASHELLS COLLECTING WITH YOU!!! its nice to know you and i enjoyed being in the same homestay with you. cooking and eating together. missed it laaa. you are such a nice friend and very tolerant. sorry if i did anything tht annoyed you or anything. hope to see you again and i wish you all the best in life yeah. take care and don't ever forget me! do keep in touch! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

NIK SYAKIRAH NIK AZIS (syak, my hilarious ex-schoolmate!)

syak, I MISS YOU!!! we are obviously going to go and get our results together. hahaha. the two weeks spent with you was so much fun especially after such a long holiday without seeing each other. i was so happy when i saw you at the interview and even happier when we both got it! i hope you get what you want in life and all the best to you, DR SHAKIRAH! i can't believe we can be so close in such a short time! but whatever it is, i will never ever forget this! and KEEP IN TOUCH!! we can right, since our house are not that far anyway. hehehehe. take care and i want to get the invi to your wedding and 'you know who' okayh! LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! =)

with lots of love, nadia. xoxo

there's more coming up, don't worry.. give me few more mins. hehehe~

=))

love, can be both;either meaningful or meaningless;

2010-02-12T09:25:00.000-08:00

i don't understand this feelings at first,
however i failed to deny that,
this feeling is so strong and pure.
its driving me out of my lively senses,
i can be floating out from this reality by your touch,
and your words just take me to another dimension,
every angles of you to me are perfect.
someday i wish i can be somebody to you,
the one that curve a smile on your face,
the one that can sweep away all your miseries and worries,
the one you love dearly,
the rose that has your thoughts most of the time,
the one so far yet very special.
you are the elixir that bring me to life,
your kiss awakens my senses,
to feel your presence,
and longed for the seconds spent together,
those precious moments are beyond words and assumptions.

if one day i shall lost half of myself,
i shall be glad to let it go,
for i had found my other half, my love.

to you-know-who-you-are,
i know this poem exceeds the limit of 20 lines, but for the sake of it as a gift, i did some adjustments. hope you don't mind. and again sorry because it is very simple and i am glad that i left it last thursday so you can pass up your own piece. its way, way better; trust me. great job on that. =)

you put me at one point where i can do nothing to save you.

2010-02-07T21:29:00.000-08:00

my attention is not worth dying for if that's what you have in mind now. and honestly now, i can't do anything to help you out. and i have no intention to do anything anyway. so, again its your life and you create a path along it whether its going to be a bliss or blunder. all the best then, i'm staying out of it.

jump on another cloud and made new rains that turn upside down smile curves back in shape

2010-02-05T07:24:00.001-08:00

i am having a really bad backache. deadly tired and exhausted but can't really sleep well. several things got me going at the moment. with somebody who complaint about a just-received laptop, (you know who you are..) pasport picture of mine that failed to be send to mr. khairul anuar, and functions (add maths, munirah made me do this.)

but yes, i need to doze off before the sun shines at noon for me tomorrow, you know what i mean right?

p/s: to nik syakirah nik azis, i understand how do you feel right now but i believe you will always success in anything that you involve in. all the best yeah babe!

pp/s: to munirah ismadi, all the best for your interview with kisas's headmaster tomorrow. basha!

ppp/s: to myself, go to sleep!

walking away, silently i tip toed till you never notice that i am no longer there.

2010-02-05T07:09:00.000-08:00

i have to do this for our own good. its not that i am not acting like a friend; though it seemed like it. but, i have to do this whether we like it or not. another wind blows and that's when you know it brought me away, as far as possible and there will never be me anymore. its been nice to know a great person like you. thanks for the memories, they will always remain. untouched.

a day will come when the nonsence makes sense.

2010-02-05T07:01:00.000-08:00

i am about to go back to this, ledger sheet. and yeah, only Allah knows how many buckets of tears i had gathered since i started account in form 4. and yet i still want to continue this. hillarious isn't it?

there will never be another.

2010-02-05T06:46:00.000-08:00

huh? what? erm, okay thanks. *yawn*

that's all that i managed to say to ayah when he passed me a newspaper section; an acca edition for accountancy. and that was like 7 a.m in the morning. okay, don't roll your eyes to me for i sleep after subuh. trying really hard to eliminate that habit, though.

dear ayah, thank you. i may not know how do you really feel knowing that i will probably be taking another course far from your profession but, i am gald for the undividable support. that means a lot to me. i love you. i really, really do. i will try my hardest best in anything i do, i will.

don't take those moments away, it will come back only once in a blue moon; more or less.

2010-02-05T05:43:00.000-08:00

A day spent with carwash with my sis worth more than i can say.. yes, that's what happened when you have no elder brother. another yeap, skillessly, the two of us had fun time spraying the water on each other rather than on the car, typical.

then came the best part, spa! hehe, the two of us dipped our feet into the bucket with those sweet-smelling mount salts. fun time, can't deny. its the memory that i won't let go. once in a blue moon that will come. hmm.

the way you held me and the sincere smile, those are the things i won't forget

2010-01-29T11:12:00.000-08:00

this post is dedicated to my sister Munirah Ismadi. yeah yeah, i know its cheesy but who cares?

those days when we used to have a fight (which we still do now) over everything. but that is one of the elements that bring us closer. we will always exchange gossips and interesting phenomenon that occured around us. back then when i was in pc, holidays will be the ultimate gossips and laughter times. that never fails. now it gets better because i actually get to share with her most of the things. anyway, she doesn't like the things i'm into like clothes, shoes and shopping which benifits me much. all the investments goes to me then. heh.

and what i wanted to say to you now is that, people can say what they feel like saying but you push that aside if its ridiculous. i always hope and pray that you will be given the chance to go to kisas but if you don't get the opportunity, it doesn't mean that you are not worth for it. there will be a better place for you. and also bout the 'you know who', forget him and life goes on! =)

remember when one door closed, another one opens. so, you decide and istikharah for the best in life. plus, we always have the regular fight now and then, but i know you love me. *wink*wink.

and yes, i love you too. my world will never be complete without you and without fighting with you. till next time.

all i want to do now is live like its nobody's bussiness, please allow me to.

2010-01-29T10:39:00.000-08:00

i am as plain as always. not that i actually a man-made robot but i do think that in certain circumstances, by potraying emotions things get worse than they already are. so, let me be honest, i don't think anyone can survive if they were to be at stake like i do now, only that; i don't care.

thanks to those who shades those spectrum on my falling snowflakes and gave it its sparkle. it will always stay that way for a long period of sempiternity. i will make sure it does.

and maybe the next time, you can come and run along with me. and make others happy.

i am dying to say that to you and you know it, but the boundary keeps me in silence.

2010-01-29T10:19:00.000-08:00

i'm sorry. maybe i will and hopefully will say that someday. you know i want to. but for now, do what you have to do and i'll do my own things. waiting is another matter and i believe the time will decide. fair enough?

if only i can tell how clueless this whole thing is with all the possibilities, the thought of it send shivers down my spine.

2010-01-29T09:53:00.000-08:00

i just can't frame the future right. i mean, the nearest will be my SPM result and after that the scholarship, college and so on and so forth. bu then, all of sudden there's so many possibilities and probabilities that kept me in a state where i can't even put a guarantee on anything. none.

some say that the result will be announced earlier and i am definitely not ready for the reveal. please, let me prepare myself and let me gather plenty of oxygen before the day comes. i am dying just to think of it. in a way i can't even secure anything or promise that i'll be fine if the result turn out not as i expected. but, like they say; if you don't have faith in yourself, nobody will. so, you know what you have to do nadia. *another heavy sigh*

call me spoilt, call me expensive i could never care less. i like what i like.

2010-01-29T09:21:00.000-08:00

one of my favourite, versace.
beautiful.

designer: bvlgari. how much? i dare not say it. :/

obvious isn't it? jimmy choo. love the diamante. okay, i am a big fan of diamonds, so to say.

yes, i love things like this. its something that i can't change. sigh.

alhamdulillah, you know the feeling when it tingles your heart. happiness slip and slide.

2010-01-27T00:32:00.000-08:00

alhamdulillah, can't help this phrase slipping my tongue. I got the offer for the Yayasan Tun Razak Leadership Programme. gone through the competitive interiew. seriously, i tell you those candidates were marvellous! thank you for the chance. i'll appreciate it much.

the right phrase is not hatred, its annoyed. that's two different bodies, mind that

2010-01-26T23:11:00.000-08:00

give a minute to get this plain. i, miss nadiatul 'afifah ismadi is a person who can't tolerate overdosed pushy attituted. i have my own life to go on with so do you.

even i am prcatically mean, but hatred is far beyond me. meaning if you think i hate you, you must have commited a big, big, unforgiven mistake. so, in this particular case, i don't hate you. and when i say no, means no. no debating.

i don't have anything else to say here because, yes; you are getting on my nerve! eventually i will learn a fact that maybe i can't get along with your pushy habits but friends understand each other. that habit is part of you and i do undertand that. so, let this be a mutualism inter-relationship; i can't tolerate anybody controlling me and saying me what to do and you may want to cut down on that big obsession. no offence.

departing, still the time hadn't moved an inch probably frozen there or was it crawling so slow that we hardly even notice?

2010-01-26T10:54:00.000-08:00

pieces of me falling. for several undefined reasons.

hoping for great study prospects, plus

9 more years, you know what i mean?

you can tell me more than what i am able to tell

2010-01-26T09:05:00.000-08:00

finally, i had the chance to blog this though its a lil' bit late. sorry to dissapoint anxious hearts. internet connection problems. pfft. -_-'

again, another outing with my ultimate stalker, (i just gave her that title since she admitted that she had been stalking, heh); farah lina. but this time it merrier because there's more of us hanging out together. the first steps got us into ELLE for a nice window shopping and aching our hearts looking at those straight-cut-off 50%. pfft. okay, let me get this right, we are supposed to be going for the exhibition by MAPCU-MCA. but then we were too early for that and made full use of our time walking and chatting. owh, by the way when i said 'we', it was referring to me, farah and his beau a.k.a my 'kawan baru'; nabil. and we bumped into nik and mustafa along the way. farah, i marked your words to buy me Paris Hilton's yeah.after diving into tonnes of handbags, shoes, purses, dresses, etc; we finally out from the shopping ground and head up to the exhibition. big time.

dashed into several boothes and got dozens of explaination of this and that. let me just hightlight a few. MedicEd. explained concerning; umm its rather very obvious, medic! talking about studying in Russia. this lady (whom her name failed to be recalled) kept looking and trying to convince me that their programme is the best. but one big problem here is, i'm not taking medic! yes, its my fault not to mention that in the first place. a good lesson of the day. the only thing in me is, hoping to get good results, a BNM scholarship and fly to UK or specifically; Oxford University to persue a degree in accountancy. yes, you did hear me right. accountancy. i know, i know, i had been crying my heart out during the two years of accounting but i think i have the heart for it. okay, farah and nabil did paid attention while i was having a hard time plastering the 'wow!-i-am-dying-to-be-a-good-doctor-with-the-help-of-your-programme-yup-definitely-interested' look. tough, seriously.

then we came across or more precisely farah did the 'shocking-me-to-death-' intro with the woman in charge at Taylor's booth and got us involved. and this lady happens to know my caouncellor, miss ayu. okay, what a small world. then she informed us about the programmes offered there; Cambridge A levels, Canadian Pre-University, International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme; or IB for short and South Australian Matriculation. very crystal clear explaination done by a guy whom seemed to master this IB programme. the cost of it also put out our dreams if we are to be self-sponsored which i hope will never be because all of us will and insyaAllah will get sponsors. Ameen.

i came out with the idea of buying tomorrow's Cosmo when farah got interviewed by one of the journalists. but sadly, i did not. sobs. farah and your other half, did u guys buy it??

then we went to MPH to play hide and seek. me and farah. kiddies. came across economics books that might be a good help for a friend who started his college apperetly, today. the present can come later right? hehe. also came across CIMA examination papers and revision books. oh, how i wished i started the CIMA already. maybe i should refer to the expert. ask pak long later la. then went to buy few things worth buying during chinese new year's sale; clothes! fundamentally.

aunty anne's did made me a scrumptious pretzels. and eventhough he treat you good, i lent him to you okay. mind that. - that was my script when i borrowed farah's spouse. she go like; sure, no problem! what friends are for! . the three of us laughed uncontrollably upon gulping that.

she was still in her complete sane when she said that, don't worry, i checked.

sarah came! a last minute but worth attempt. then we went our seperate ways; me and sarah, farah and nabil. so, we headed to the exhibition then called nik to ask his whereabout. thought of hanging out together. then when we reached the exhibition ground, which left us with few more steps to go in, when nik gave us the idea to dine first. arghh. but then, i spontaneously agreed. nandos, yup i stayed to join them for a moment. my mum called saying she's reaching to pick me and farah up so sadly i said to sarah;

nadia:weyh, kalau aku 'ter'balik, nanti you hangout with them (nik and mustafa) ek?

sarah: huh?? (suspens look) aku pun 'ter'balik jugak la. whine.

and yup, i did left kinda early as in in the middle of their meal. sorry, sorry, sorry.

great time, people. thank you very,very much for that.

p/s: farah, no problem. sharing is caring. plus, what friends are for? haha, yup; big, big time you owe me. :))

pp/s: dear, 'kawan baru', nabil; thanks for being a new follower. oh, and you may go back to whos arms you belong to..need i say more? :)

i mean it, let the hand do the talking or do the talking to the hand. either way possible

2010-01-18T01:06:00.000-08:00

driving me to a wits end that i don't know how to describe. please, if you need me, i'll always be here but do tell me what is wrong or what had happened or whatever that tells me your real situation.

that is... if i am still considered as a friend.

new steps;teaches oneself, widen experiences

2010-01-18T00:28:00.000-08:00

sweating and panting but had an enjoyable or i dare say, healthy;morning walk with a long lost friend, munirah. then came all the gossips and girltalk which was even more gossips; till we had covered everybody on the list. :/

we then had drinks in ' i-don't-remember-where-is-it' restaurant. then eat breakfast. asked for the bill with fingers crossed. 'please say that it will not be more than 10 ringgit, please..'

damnit! its was there right in front of me with the bill clearly showed the figures. RM 10.50. argh! lacking of 50 cent.. what do we do now? me and munirah exchanged confusing looks. we do hope we know anybody there. because my house is actually miles away by foot! whatever it is, not going to go back and have to come again for 50 cent. never!

then munirah told me a trick she had been practising since,.. ever; to pay whatever sum you owe in your next visit. cool eyh? so, with a very deep, bright, red, blushing cheek i slowly asked one of the waiter can i actually do that; i mean pay the remaining 50 cent later? hey, that was my first time okay! and probably the last one too. he smiled and nod. whee~

paid the ten ringgit and promise to be back later. then this guy said, 'ok. tapi kalau tada angkat 50 sen, cuci pinggan sini'. gulp.

deadly desperate no? haha. true, was deliriously desperate. then, we went back home with happy stomaches but worried minds thinking of the 50 cent debt. or was it worried bout having to actually scrub the plates and all?? both.

that was how steps to section 8 Kota Damansara cost me a long, exhausting walk. (ceh, mcm jauh sgt je..), but definitely a nice story to tell in exchange.

hold my hands and i will hold yours back

2010-01-17T01:53:00.000-08:00

if i was to be alone for a minute just now, anything pleasant or the other way round could had happened. luckily, you were there. before i fall you caught my hands, right before i crashed and may never get up again. thanks

a story you told me made sense;

if you had lose faith in yourself, take *** for example.. when we are waiting for the bank negara scholarship result, all of us said that we will pray hard for her to get the scholarship she deserves. but instead, she said to pray that she will be strong to face the reality and redha if the scholarship is not hers.

that made a person strong after all... everybody faced a situation where they didn't get what they want.

and i asked, 'did *** get the scholarship?'

she didn't, but she's okay with it. she still applied for other opportunities. there must be a place for her somewhere else. there must be.

'i wish i can be like ***' sigh..

you can nadia, you are strong enough. me and *** thought so of you! get up girl!

nana, i owe you. big time. thanks.

no prob. friend in need is a friend indeed. =)

nana_fizan92 has signed out.(17/01/2010 05:54 pm)
yahoo messenger

Subhanallah.. i felt so guilty for not to be able to accept that i haven't destined to my destiny yet. how naive i was. thank you for those who made me realize this. thank you. very, very much.

if you do read this post, nana;

nana, i need to tell you this,
you had done so much for me. those support and words did bring me to a whole new perspective. i have to say, one of the memories that i valued the most in pc is the moment with the bahas team, and those heart pouring session with you in the old days. (wink, wink)
thanks a lot.
no words else describe it best.

p/s: to Nik Syakirah Nik Azis, Mariana Nabila Ahmad Zuber and Muhammad Hakim bin Jaafar; congratulations for the Bank Negara Scholarship offer. May this lead to a greater success in the future. May Allah bless.

aphonic, a picture carries a million words

2010-01-17T01:17:00.000-08:00

need i say more??

i want this so damn badly that i might hurt myself. Ya Allah, i had made mistakes (tonnes of them) in the past and You had shown and taught me brilliant lessons that no other schools can ever teach me. and yes, it does hurt; a lot. it will scarred me deep but if this is the cost i have to pay for my weakness, wrongdoings and mistakes; i deserve it. i will have to buy it.

when the last snow falls, it still contains the misery of winter blunder it begun with

2010-01-17T00:50:00.000-08:00

when you know that feeling is ill, you will try your hardest best to get rid of it. but in another word, in may not and will never be that easy. i felt tremendously guilty to be so filthy and mean. stop it. now.

i wish, wish, and keep wishing it could be that easy. i can't but i'm still trying.

i don't want to stay here anymore. being so helpless and clueless is definitely painful. bail me out. i can't stand this anymore.

perfection, ace, success and scholarship; tough fight. very very tough.

2010-01-15T02:16:00.000-08:00

indecribable feeling. let me cry all this misery away. as away as possible. i just can't tell the ultimate dissapointment, depression, frustration and ecetera. failed to act nonchalant and plain. i ain't strong enough for this. ain't strong enough. let me hide myself this one moment, to blow away all this sadness. let it be blown away.

let me stand, hold my back no more. i may fall this first time, but i want to stand alone; and i will.

sick, sick, sick...

2010-01-15T01:45:00.000-08:00

a night of sleepless night really cost me a bomb! can't breathe, for real. through the night,..breathless night.. pfft. really tired. very, very tired. and sick.

countless regrets, priceless lessons

2010-01-12T00:46:00.000-08:00

flash fact of life, simple yet unbearable. failed once, face the tailing regrets, heartbreaks and those dissapointing bits after that. they come in a package. regret, regret, regret; millions of untold and unchanged regret. praying hard. god, tears are filling my eyes, accompanied me through sleepless nights. hoping, wishing and desperately need of a miraculous success. please.

nowhere to run when you know you have to wait. nothing to do other than patiently wait. growing up in such environment, where everything matters is always made you feel everything does matter! every single thing;.. matters. i should and must live beyond expactation. perform extremely well in everything i do. midas touch, ever heard of that?

excuse me, need a moment of serenity and please make way..

p/s: congrats and all the best to Nursyafizan Amalina Rahamzan and Muhammad Hakim Jaafar for the Yayasan Khazanah's interview.

i'll have to walk away before i said something i will regret; i will have to walk away

2010-01-10T23:58:00.000-08:00

i know you had enough of lame excuses that i showered you with, but i have to. i have to go before those lines slipped my tongues. i'm sorry. very very sorry

miraculously ended up long walk and talk for two; just two

2010-01-10T18:34:00.000-08:00

(picture, courtesy of brilliantlydumb.blogspot.com)

my feet still ache due to such a long walk among hundreds or thousands of people; old and young throughout the exhibition. yup, the Star Educational Fair 2010 in KLCC. those dodging hours were gratefully helpful. booth 1 was masterskill. big, big mistake! i was an inadvertent one, walking into that booth and being explained on nursing! xperasan that big, big signboard named MASTERSKILL. pfft. after filling in the form and hoping that they won't call us, (me and farah) walked out with annoying smile plastered on each other's face. haha. pity.

walking, walking, walking. finally, found doctorjob's booth (its not that we are looking for it anyway, lucky stop), bought few mags and guide books. the wheel of fortune was fun. rm 10 voucher from Jusco, ok la kan? rather than a pen?? ala, it was just next to the voucher! (hope nobody rouged bt this) then came another long walk and brochures-collecting procedures. duh! i remembered somebody said that the job market for medical doctors are packed or too packed in fact. so, at that moment i was moved. the rushing atmosphere around gave me a few sec of soul-searching. dramatic. but i know i don't want to be somebody working in the medical field. i do have a slight interest for it but, i'm not into this whole medical thing. so, this CIMA booth really gave me the idea to go for what i like. courtesy of Pn. Zahidah Mokhtar. she mentioned that go for whatever i like first and the degree can tail along after. great motivation. many thanks. i know farah was deadly bored by this but, worth it for i had made up my mind (at least that's what i thought; LOL).

finally, 1 p.m! lunch! those culinary art students did made us mouthwattered by those pasteries and muffins. gulp. teppanyaki was not that bad for a lunch in that packed food court. met Aida Nabila! miss her a lot! farah ate pepperoni pizza, a whole of that! no joke, no offence yeah. then made a run to the kinokuniya for 2010 diary, which i had deadly needed since 1.1.2010. sigh. another rush plus more walking to the exhibition. while walking along the beautiful park; exclude the eye-sickening sight of those teens and camera snapshots, dozens of 'if onlys' tailing behind. heh, nobody can come out from Suria KLCC without a dream right? if only.., if only,... haha. big time. then came the long list of lim kok wing, President's College (it have to be written in upper case letter, when talking bout president's. most stylish and glamorous plus well furnished booth. prestigous.), segi , taylor's, UCSI, KDU, monash, and this list go on for eternity.

glad that was over! the fair, i mean. next, shopping!! haha. hunting for sling bag, here and there. fianlly, vincci; yup got a gorgeous, white one. belongs to farah now. hehe. if only i had a millionaire as a boyfriend,.. you can have the last part. if only,.. if only,... go on another forever long list. heh, typical.

got back home with dreams of future career, future study, future loaded hubby; seriously, heavy heads stored with info and dreams, tonnes of homework to flip through the mags and brochures, sore feet but satisfying hearts, no farah? i can see her nodding. haha. anyway, that exhibition was very helpful and pleasurable. bouquet of thank yous.

p/s: farah, keep that sling clean,yeah. haha.

pp/s: stop dreaming, get moving, moving, moving!

hold on to another piece, one day we can keep them both; together

2010-01-09T02:23:00.000-08:00

there are several things in life we had to let go. willing or unwillingly. friends, a team, school life, shrunken dresses, ecetera.

but sometimes, when we look back; we find that we let go whatever there were for the better. don't you think?

i'll walk out out of your life until that one second you know you miss me

2010-01-08T22:00:00.000-08:00

that hits me hard on the face. dumbfounded.

if you don't see me now, if you don't see me before..

2010-01-08T21:05:00.001-08:00

among all the equally beautiful flowers, which stand taller than the other? there must be one, at least one in particular that you will like better than the others. why?? they are all amazing; just the same.

ahh, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. only to the eyes of the beholder.

when too many roads diverged in a yellow wood

2010-01-08T06:48:00.000-08:00

choices in life are good; typically seen as chances or options in regular. but have ever one sees it as a burden? a confusion? when you take one road, you dissapoint others. i had been through this plenty of times but still failed to ensure the next time, i won't have to decide again; between two choices. like that's ever going to happen. *sigh*
sometimes i even wonder how to make the CORRECT choices throughout problems, scandals and even fundamental phenomenon? to get a glass ahead, the glass that i'm holding now slipped and shattered into million pieces. then another glass seems to gleams nearby. which one to take and handle with care? confusing right? *another heavy sigh*
hopefully, i'm directed towards choices that benifits me now and hereafter. ameen.

expose of a surgeon's life in OT

2010-01-07T01:59:00.000-08:00

honestly, of all this while, i had never get a privillage as a surgeon's daughter. seriously. but then, today i had given an ultimate chance, rarely experienced by medical students themselves, a visit to the operation theater (OT)!! it was amazing! met an anaesthetist; Dr. Husein (sory if misspelled) and other staffness. learnt several medical facts and stuff. until now, i'm not sure if medic is what i want to do as a runway for the future. but ayah seemed serious about wanting me to follow his footsteps though he never voices it out. not yet.
however, to those people involved in this fabulous medical moments, many thanks. it was a tremendous experience. a miracle.

i need space... a bigger one

2009-12-31T17:32:00.000-08:00

i have never been locked in a cage nor lack of freedom all my life. but i need to say this for i can't stand anymore raining phonecalls and overdose concern. those angst had been thoughtful of you but i had enough thank you. this new start ahead, i want my life back. which means, single. very single. far from any extra disquieting commitments and vexatious insistences. please. i can't live like this anymore, no matter how hard i tried. fyi, friends are those people that i treasure and appreciate much but i never call or text or hang out with everyday. and i do not have to report my wherabouts all the time. friends are friends ok? so, with this words; i made up my mind not be too attached to oneself for the time being to give myself enough time and thoughts for my family, my interests and my fundamental responsibilities. please and thank you. (i don't care how ridiculous does this sound, i write what i have to write.)

2010; just me, myself and I

2009-12-31T03:11:00.000-08:00

a new start 2010. a new beginning that I will never mess up, not his time. never.

pasts, let alone sweet or sad is always a part of oneself

2009-12-27T09:23:00.000-08:00

permanent memories, is all i'll ever take along the way. history can be sweet sometimes that made us look back, keen to find everywhere else possible to let it run again.. bahas mrsm pc is one of them. dearest teammates, we will always be together in a team, despite the distance and differences in life. its been a pleasure.

to know you are there is enough

2009-12-27T08:24:00.000-08:00

nadia, get a hold of yourself. this couldn't be that bad, hopefully. friends are forever, true? so, why worry? just never let go, never let go.

tell me more

2009-12-26T21:11:00.000-08:00

this morning was just as plain as all the other mornings. woke up on a different bed, though. the chilly morning zephyr here made no change to my dismal beginning. need an immediate tranquilizer. preposterous fairy tale. with time crawling so slow, how i am suppose to bear this responsibilities, sacrifices and the other elements i'm forced to live with for years? tell me more..

can you keep a secret?

2009-12-25T23:33:00.000-08:00

secretly, i longed for you;
secretly, i dreamt of you;
secretly, i adore you;
secretly, i believe in you;
secretly, i miss you;
secretly, i want you;
honestly, i love you.

*tears shed...*

thanks for those undescribable moments

2009-12-25T22:33:00.000-08:00

sobs* still tongue-tied. syntesising failed. whatever reasons this is happening, i know this is the best. anyway, thaks a lot for all smiles curved, laughters and shoulder to cry on. those were worthwhile; still are aand always were.let me say this again, once and for all; i miss you. thank you.

life can be painful with unexpected twists and turns along the way

2009-12-25T20:51:00.000-08:00

paused. can't believe what had just happened. i need a break, some moments to transalate this. muted, when it was for real. all that i can say is that Allah knows best. all we do is just to follow.

every patience has a limit

2009-12-24T21:54:00.000-08:00

anybody wishes to commit suicide now for whatever reasons life is all about? please do let me know for i will be happy to commit it for you. thank you. YES! I DEFINITELY FEEL LIKE STABBING SOMEBODY RIGHT NOW! WHY?? BECAUSE SHE IS SO SELF-CENTERED, SICKENING, AND A TOTAL BASTARD PLUS VERY "PROTECTIVE" GIRLFRIEND WHO LOCK HER BOYFRIEND IN A TOWER AND CUT OFF ALL THE COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS! PATHETIC. please.. control.. whatever! i hate her for some reason i do and nobody has the right to question that! clear??

alhamdulillah, silent prayers had been answered..

2009-12-23T21:43:00.000-08:00

i can't help to smile when my eyes laid on the slip. though it was not mine but the feeling and triggers were just the same. alhamdulillah and kisses alone can never describe the wonderful feelings to share such a blessed and unforgettable moment. may Allah bless those who had contribute enough for this flying colours result of 9 A's straight. alhamdulillah. its raining phonecalls from now on. 3..2..1., hello, thank you for such a wonderful congrats. i am flabbergasted.

for a minute there, i was lost

2009-12-23T09:34:00.001-08:00

where do i need to start? ehm...

my world is falling apart the minute it was pieced together

2009-12-23T09:09:00.000-08:00

what had been so great fer me is definitely a big no-no now. i don't understand was it me or the perfect atmosphere that i am living in seems to shed.. (exclude the global warming, greenhouse effect, etc..) *sigh* i had enough with all of this pop-up scandals. i need no more! its not that unbearable but its more than pathetic. pleasela, when i say we need to talk this over; we simply have to before this matter is out of bound. to make it plain, i have no reason at all to be mean as my patience is still on par. lets just wait and be kind for just a little while, shall we?

boredom can be fatal for some reasons

2009-12-23T00:38:00.000-08:00

i'm bored to death, thank you.. that's all i got

life like they say, isn't long but long enough to make you wonder how lo live it

2009-12-22T23:31:00.000-08:00

see that shiny black BMW nadia? if you want it, hard work and great paycheck can promise that. its a typical steps in life where you want something, work and work for it. sometimes I wonder where all the things that you had in life went. I mean after they were gone. like friends for instance. Its not like they just vanish in thin air, but they are just gone. remember those days in primary one when you actually found a friend whom do you stick to and went recess together? she or he was the best and only friend. a while ago i wonder where she might be. (or in other word, recall who 'she' is, can't remember) okay. things are different now, as we aged. i mean, grow up of course. those days in primary were hilarious! mirthful jokes were passed on in whispers. those years were,... veracious. things started to get serious and staid when crawling into secondary. friends come and go, i paste that firmly in mind. a piece of memory when exchange of books occur to copy undone homeworks (stereotype).

the dream

2009-12-13T08:32:00.000-08:00

huh? sorry, was I dreaming? okay, I am about to dream further and you might want to do something else while I do this.. pfft*

what to do? You add to my list

2009-12-13T08:17:00.000-08:00

The things I want and need to do after SPM, which means, NOW!~
~boys over flowers (plus a few other dramas that my sys forced me to)
~learning french and korean (penat weyh!)
~driving license
~helping the maid (teramatlah terpakse)
~updating this and that
~hanging out
~reading and finishing all the books
~soul-searching (deciding which path to take, medical or accountancy)
~shopping (all the time kowt! stereotypic)
~grooming baby (my beloved persian cat)
~slimming and getting fit (considerably 'berisi', far from fat, clear?)
~praying hard fer the brain-busting SPM result!!

baby i'm back!

2009-12-13T06:50:00.000-08:00

Phewh.. so good to be home... had been tough for the past few years.. (2 years, i mean). So, talking about life, 2 years if battling for the ultimate destination.. (quit all this shakespear thingy, so out of bound) talking about life so far?? still can't believe that school was over.. sad+happy+grateful+ etc..
looking forward fer gathering... prom... driving license.. movies... shopping!! whatever else possible..
memoir? hehe.. too much to tell.. I definitely wish to turn the time back.. spin the time to my preschool years. ahh, fun time, those days.. remember the days when everybody eager for the recess bell. and fleed to the playground. haha. girls were always with their childish whines about barbies and princesses. (i was excluded)
The next thing i know, primary school begun. being a nomad was so much fun! year 1 in SK Sri Petaling, year 2, in Methodist Girls School, year 3 in St Theresa, year 4 and so on in SK Tropicana. Miss those days. (psst, I wrote my first love letter when I was in standard 5. Shhh~) UPSR was devastating. no need to elaborate on that...
Finally, school ia over!!! I'm feeling old.. (ehem, I mean, matured. heh, yeah right.)
Time for growing up, secondary school! I felt so matured when i stepped out of the primary school's gate. But then, when I first set foot in secondary school, gosh I was SMAALL!! and cute! hhaaha (I don't mean to brag) So, to cut things short, PMR, alhamdulillah, passed with flying colours. (hope yours is too, dearest sys, munirah, insyaAllah) Offered to MRSM Pengkalan Chepa was the beginning of my journey.. tough but sweet.. uhmm, details? those who knew, consider yourself lucky. those who don't ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!
Finally, school ia over!!! I'm feeling old.. (ehem, I mean, matured. heh, yeah right.) To all my beloved friends, no matter from which era do you come from, do keep in touch.. Miss you all so much... hope to hear from all of you soon..

you know you love me,
nadia ismadi

sos

2009-07-17T18:53:00.000-07:00

This thing is sure killing me!! gosh, y do we have to do this when da big battle (SPM) is right under everbody's noses!!! urgh! da la xtau stu bnde pn psl resume. Okayh, correction ; da la xtau apebnde nk include n exclude! argh!!! stress!
nadia, stop talking craps please... so, excuse me~

you know you love me,
~nadia

finally, we made it; we break it~

2009-05-28T09:22:00.000-07:00

we break it;~

after.....

we made it~;

wait... give me a second.. I need 2 synthesis this first... gimme a minute~

whatever, i'm home!~

go green!

2009-03-19T06:25:00.000-07:00

the Earth is losing its sparkle which used to be embraced by all.

a great world we live in is not so great anymore. more populations = more destructions!

so, lets try our best to contribute to the environment. Its in our hands, dare to make a change!

now and then

2009-03-17T21:27:00.000-07:00

need i say more?

what's next? Get back 2 being nerd??

or a shopaholic, perhaps?

a definite cleanup; chop, chop!

or, a girls-day-out?

or let's get my first car; shall we? (not to mention, a license)

or, a luxurious cruise will do?

maybe, somebody should ring the wedding bells?

or, is a plastic surgery necessary?

So much to do.

Life cycle starts after I throw the unfabulous thing on my head named, 'graduation hat'.

but,

the journey towards the 'graduation' is..............

SURPRISE!

you know you love me,

~nadia~

cachinnate

2009-03-17T20:30:00.000-07:00

gorgeous, isn't she?

I don't know why I must be like this, but i can't help it. With all these stressin' SEM, homeworks, worst of all; SPM. Its a choleric outburst seeing school-leaver......, leave! Gosh, some of them walk out with I don't know how many A's in hand. inarticulate. incoherent. dumbfounded. I had been telling myself;

nadia, this is so time to change n be more mature than you already are. You don't have to think like a grandmother, just act like one!

Now I'm talking like a granny! Gosh! Can I get anymore pathetic than I already are?

you know you love me;

~nadia~

a cinderella story

2009-03-16T00:51:00.000-07:00

Most fairy tales end up with happily ever after, but i don't think happily ever after will last forever. For instance, when you had someone called "maid" to help you out (or rather do all the things for you), even before you were born; and suddenly, you had to do everything on your own, it is not a happily ever after momentos.

hah, typical cinderalla story. Maybe its a bit different because I have not considered the element of the prince charming.

Its okay nadia, this is the time that you can learn the fact of life. You will do this and you will do this right!

love is blind

2009-03-15T06:40:00.000-07:00

yeah, right.. that so-called "blind".. its sickening.. sometimes, its nauseating.. I had enough.. Sometimes it caused you to stand between the two people in life that you can't afford to dissapoint. Most of the time, it turns your life upside down; a minute you are sad, frustrated and the next second, you can't help smiling as if the world is yours.. typical love sick.. Why can't love stay where it is on one particular person? Why must it be here and there? Okay, you didn't get me. nvmnd.

~

2009-01-26T18:17:00.000-08:00

goodbye..

till next time,

pleasure~

2009-01-26T17:44:00.000-08:00

my beloved grandma, grateful

under the dim light

Lobby Mutiara Hotel (last day)

leave-taking

2009-01-25T17:17:00.000-08:00

Farewell to Johor Bahru.

Thanx for the sweet memories.

Sad to say goodbye. (to the short break)

and sad to say hello. (to MARA Junior Science College Pengkalan Chepa)

still got plenty of to-do chores that are undone.
*get my glasses
*take Baby to the vet
*prepare HOST script and oral text
*appointment with my specialist
*appointment with my dentist
*go to FRIM for the progress of my SEM project (this is quite impossible because the staff are on CNY break) - out of the list-
*remeber other things to do on the list- wth?

Its back to school, again; I guess~

Johor Bahru~

2009-01-25T08:51:00.000-08:00

A great time in JB. Big hugs and kisses to ayah for giving me the chance to rest my mind out of the stressful routine in school. Really appreciate that. Big thanks to my grandparents that are willing to come all the way from Penang to KL and then to JB.

As usual, for me, the foods and cuisines are superb. That means, more FATS!!! Alright people, I need a fast liposuction before the Taekwondo Tournament in March. Too bad. Danga Bay is

B-A-U-T-Ful! Shopaholic on the move. So many eye-catching things but so little time! Rush hours, dashing here and there. Most of the time spent on dining, eating, fattening, etc. Big 'duh'.

I am way,way behind schedule! I really don't want to go back to school. *Pfft* (so typical pf me)~

Big bouquet of thanks to,

Mutiara Hotel Johor Bahru

brief bliss

2009-01-23T18:26:00.000-08:00

going for a day trip to JB.

a day, a day

*eyes-rolling*

pfft

details later;

need to go packing

perfect morning, flawless sunshine

2009-01-22T17:47:00.000-08:00

waking up

on my own bed

in my own room

ahh, a small piece of heaven*